Dreamcatcher Imagines - Oneshots | (Girl x Girl)

🐺 Maison - Siyeon (OT7)

All members x Female Reader
(Siyeon focus)
8th member au
Status - Finished (1 part) ✅
Warnings ~ angst, very brief implications of homophobia, fluff

A/N: DREAMCATCHER SECOND WIN 🥺 I know I'm late, I wanted to post something when it happened but I've been busy preparing for finals. But I'm so happy for them, they deserve it. I also love that they finally started believing in themselves again. You could tell they prepared their speeches so they obviously expected to win again and that makes me really happy.

The plain hotel room that greeted us when we got back from the concert venue was quiet and dark. I left it that way, just taking a seat in the far corner of the room, letting out a sigh when I was finally off my feet. Without a word, Siyeon slipped into the bathroom and I heard the shower turn on not long after. For the next 15 minutes, I stayed there, listening to the muffled sound of running water and allowing my mind to wander.

Touring is one of my favorite things I got to do as an idol. But it wasn't always as enjoyable as it should've been. The shows were fun, but those long periods in between concerts gave me too much time to think. Too much time to realize that I had less freedom as an idol. It had always been my dream to become a singer, but I never fully considered what I'd have to give up in order to fulfill that dream. Now I often wondered if it was even worth it.

Especially here in my home country where I'm reminded by the fans' unapologetic personalities of what I gave up. Had I stayed here and chosen any other profession, I wouldn't have to hide such a big part of myself. I'd be free to be who I was and live the way I wanted without fear of judgement. It was different for the other members because they grew up having to act that way. For me, it was still hard to adjust. And it hurt having to pretend.

My thoughts brought on an unavoidable feeling of stress that heated up my cheeks and I felt the urge to get some fresh air to clear my head. So, I ended up outside, leaning over the shallow balcony attached to our hotel room, enjoying the feeling of the summer breeze gliding across my face. I was up high enough that the street noise was muffled by the wind. It was peaceful, yet somehow made me feel lonely. As I took in the soft white surface of the moon, I couldn't help but feel trapped by my situation and wonder whether anyone else could possibly understand this feeling.

As if my negative thoughts were loud enough to hear, I felt arms wrap around me from behind. At first I was startled by the sudden contact, momentarily forgetting I wasn't alone, but eventually I leaned back into her touch with a heavy sigh, knowing it was Siyeon. She put her head on my shoulder, her nose almost touching my left cheek, and I let my hands rest on top of hers. Being in her arms instantly made me feel better. It felt like her way of reminding me that I really wasn't alone.

"What's on your mind, jagi?" Siyeon whispered softly near my ear. The pet name made my heart flutter but the clear concern in her tone brought the negative emotions back. I hated feeling this way. Not just because it sucked feeling so lost, but because I hated making her feel helpless.

Sighing again, I looked out over the city wishing that everything was different. "I'm just wondering if I made the right choice becoming an idol."

I just wanted to pretend that I was here with Siyeon in my hometown, not for a concert, not because we were idols in the same group, but because I invited her here on a trip to do something normal, like meet my family or go visit my favorite places from my childhood. I didn't want to have to worry about people taking pictures of us or fans asking for autographs. I didn't want that obligation that comes with being famous. But, most of all, I didn't want the constant unrealistic expectations put on me.

Without replying, Siyeon turned me around in her arms and put her hands on my cheeks. We stayed like that for a few seconds, just staring into each other's eyes and I felt so much love seeing the way she looked at me: Like I was the most important thing in the world. Like I was the only thing in the world. There was no doubt in my mind that she would love and protect me with everything in her for the rest of her life. It wasn't even a question whether I would do the same.

"I know you wish things were different... I do too." Her voice was still soft as she rubbed her thumb across my cheek while her eyes took in every inch of my face. I wondered how she always knew exactly what I was thinking. "But look at it this way..." She stopped her movements and stared into my eyes again. "If you hadn't become an idol," the corner of her lips tilted upwards revealing half of her beautiful smile, "you would've never met us." Her mouth closed in a smile that showed off her cheekbones and her eyes looked like they were sparkling under the starlight.

Though I still felt the weight of my negative thoughts, her statement managed to make me smile. She's right. Through one of the most difficult choices of my life I may have been forced to conceal a part of who I was, but I still ended up finding seven of the most important people in my life. Even if I felt like being an idol had more risks than rewards, those seven girls made it worth it. At least I could be myself around them and they loved the part of me that I wasn't allowed to show anyone else.

"You're right." I whispered and leaned forward so that my forehead was resting against hers and our noses were touching. Even when I felt lost, she kept me grounded. Her and the other members... they were where I felt like I belonged. Where I felt found. They were home.

"I love you so much, you know that, right?" Siyeon told me, her voice so quiet that I almost thought I was imagining it. She had told me she loved me countless times before, but something about this one felt different. It felt deeper.

"I know." And I did. I knew that she meant it. And I knew what she meant. It was hard to explain, but I felt it too. We loved each other and the other members in a way that couldn't be defined. It wasn't a friendship, but it wasn't a romantic relationship either. It was more than that. We all loved each other so much that we couldn't bear the thought of living without one another. It felt like we were meant to be together. Like we were destined to meet. Like soulmates. And, as long as it was up to us, we would be together until the day we died.

Sometimes it felt like I didn't have the words to tell them how much they meant to me. And I think that's why Siyeon did what she did after I told her I loved her back... she kissed me. It was gentle and just enough to express how she felt. She had never kissed me before, but it didn't seem any different than her hugging me or kissing me on the cheek. It was just another way for her to show how much she loved me. Sua did it often with me and a few of the other members who accepted it and Jiu occasionally did it too, but I knew it meant more to Siyeon. Since she did it less often, it had more of an impact. She wanted me to know how deeply she cared for me.

Once it was over, I buried my head in the crook of her neck with my arms wrapped around her torso. She pulled me close with hers around my shoulders and combed her fingers through my hair. I stayed there, breathing in her fresh scent and feeling completely content. It didn't matter if the world didn't know who I truly was, because at least they did.