Chapter 160

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We leave the house after Sarah gets me a pair of Alice's flats and I grab my coat from the car. It was warm this morning but it is cold again after the downpour. I'm not surprised, we live in England and the heat was a rare occurrence to begin with, especially in October.

"It's half term in two weeks. A week off. Do we have any plans?" Sarah asks as we make our way down her street.

"They're going to open a funfair at Rendields Park," Hannah announces. We go every time one opens in the city. Which happens two or three times a year. Around Valentine's Day, the Summer holidays and rarely Halloween time.

Halloween reminds me. "My mum is making me take Sierra, and her friend, and Isabella trick or treating on Halloween. Again."

I seriously hope Amanda isn't said friend this year since Sierra fell out with the one that came along last year.

"Five years in a row," Sarah laughs. "Well, I'm starting a new streak this year's Halloween and going to a party. What about you, Hannah banana, wanna join me?" Sarah's inquisitive eyes turn on me. "Hazel? Wanna break your streak?"

"Yeah, no, parties still make me claustrophobic."

I shake my head. "No. I'm fine with my streak." Truth is, I don't think I'll ever be okay with attending parties or clubs. My body will seize with panic every other minute and I would cling to Sarah and ruin her fun.

"Okay, no Halloween. So what else we going to do?" Sarah wonders.

"We should have another sleepover. At my place this time," I suggest. "My mum will be staying at my auntie's for a couple of days so we'll have the house to ourselves."

Her husband will then stay at his mum's house because I can't cook anything other than simple breakfast meals. But I'm sure there's another reason why he stays there that neither my mum nor I know of. Or maybe she does and doesn't want to tell me. I don't think he's having an affair but I know it's got to do with me. I have an inkling as to what it could be but I don't like to think too much about it because I feel as though it has something to do with my past.

Sarah's face brightens. "Oh, and we have to go watch Timothée Chalamet's new movie. And bowling, we haven't gone in ages."

"What about our Disney Land trip?" Hannah bursts out but then just as fast, regret floods her features. "I'm sorry. I didn't—."

"It's fine," Sarah interrupts her. "My grandmother is perfectly fine now. What do you guys want? Should we go in the Easter holidays? Or the summer holidays when the weather is nice and warm. Or New Years? Well after Christmas."

We had saved up to go to the Disney land in France for the summer holidays, but Sarah's grandma suddenly became very ill so Sarah and her family had to immediately fly to the Netherlands.

She told us to go without her but we couldn't even absorb the thought so we postponed it for however long she needed. It was either all of us or none of us.

"It's going to have to be the summer holidays again. I have finals right after the Easter holidays," I tell them.

"Mine are before."

"Same," Hannah adds.

Not a surprise. They are both in university and I'm still in college.

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