We're going to need more than five minutes

But how about his sweater?

She got back into her car and started the engine. Took a few more deep breaths and wiped away a few last tears before steering it onto the road, her headlights sparkling on the wet asphalt and finally leaving him behind in darkness. In the end, they didn't even share a last kiss goodbye. Should she have asked him? Would that have been weird? Anyway, it didn't matter now, it was too late anyway. And probably for the best.

With another deep breath she switched herself into „autopilot", that's how she called it. A useful and absolutely crucial skill to master as an actor. No matter the type of day she's had, whether it had been the best or the worst day of her life, she had to lock all of that away somewhere inside when she was working and would only consciously and willingly let it back out if it served her in a scene. Her autopilot mode had been invaluable to her, especially during „Once Upon A Time" – while Regina's story had become happier and happier, her own life, sadly, had taken the opposite turn, from being happily in love, getting married... to then seeing her relationship fall apart and ultimately getting divorced. The day they had filmed the scenes where Regina gets her long sought after happy ending, being crowned the „Good Queen" of the united realms, had been the day that she had moved out of Fred's house and said goodbye to her three stepsons whom she had watched grow up for the past seven years.

Without owning her own emotion space, there's no way she would have been able to cope. And there most certainly would have been no way that she were able to function now, after leaving Jordane in the dust, so helplessly and desperately kneeling on the floor.

There was one thing though that was absolutely crucial for her autopilot to work: she needed to be busy to keep her mind occupied. The busier, the better. When she was working, she was definitely busy enough. But when she wasn't... that's when it got really tough. It was those days where she didn't know what else to do with herself other than think, doubt, remember, question and regret. Those days... and the nights.

She swallowed. Oh... the nights were the worst! The nights, alone in her large, cold bed. By now, it was almost 7pm, and she already knew that she wouldn't be going to sleep tonight. She'd power through until she'd almost faint from exhaustion and her mind would just switch off by itself. Only then would she be able to truly get some rest. It was certainly not ideal, but it was a tried and true approach.

She checked her agenda in her phone and selected all the chores she could still complete this evening. Then prioritized them based on the ideal route through the city between here and home. Why not put desperate times to good use and finally knock some things off her to do list? She went to the post office before it closed, then picked up her dry cleaning, lastly, she stopped by the grocery store, even though she wasn't even quite sure what to get. Would she buy her usual, healthy and organic, produce heavy groceries, or didn't she rather deserve the breakup menu? Junk food, ice cream... and most importantly, booze? In the end though, she went for the former. She still had ice cream at home, as well as a large selection of alcohol, and as far as the junk food was concerned... she actually remembered now that she had pre-ordered dinner to be delivered from her favorite burger place in town for them to celebrate his first night in his new home – theirs.

Because of this, and because she finally remembered her two dogs who must have been desperately waiting for her after she had barely been around all day, she went straight home and made it just in time before the delivery guy rang her bell. She had put on some happy music and tried to focus her thoughts on singing along to a „Best of 90s" playlist when she received the large paper bag containing the juicy and cheesy goodness she had ordered. At least half of this would go directly to the fridge or to the dogs since it was way too much food of course for just one person. She served herself some burger with chili cheese fries – Jordane's favorites, which she tried to not think about – and along with her exquisite dinner, she popped the bottle of expensive champage that she had bought and chilled for the occasion. Might have been a waste, but what else would she have kept it for? It wasn't like she'd have much to celebrate anytime soon anyway.