Slowburn

Chapter 95 (Renzo's POV)

         "I don't know what the fuck to say to her" I fisted my hair and looked to my brother and cousin who were also standing outside of Kat's townhouse awaiting our men. Dante looked like a pup with its tail tucked, and my brother just looked to be thinking hard. 

"We knew this day would come" Rocco finally spoke up. 

"Did we?! Cus I sure as fuck didn't" I pinched the bridge of my nose trying not to rowl myself up again. I need to be clear minded. Not only did Kat find out that I've killed before, but there is a threat on her life I need to worry about. 

"You're always the man with the contingency plan. You didn't foresee this possibility and prepare yourself?" Dante turned from the hood of the car he was sitting against smoking his tenth cigarette. I was pacing on the sidewalk. 

        "Call me an optimist. I blindly hoped this day wouldn't come, so no I do not have a plan" I kicked a rock down past the walkway. "Not even a plan for if Kat was ever in danger?" My brother looked surprised. "No, of course I have a plan for that. I have six plans for that in case of multiple scenarios. But I can't get Kat to safety if she won't come near me, can I?"

"You can grab her kicking and screaming" Dante side eyed me. "That's my last resort" I shook my head, looking up at her empty bay window for the hundredth time. I felt that tension in my gut that was starting to piss me off. 

"Whoever did this is going to die a miserable death. Not only did they threaten my girl, but they outed my secret. They'll fucking regret it" I cranked my neck and looked away from the window. 

        "I hate standing around like this. I want to be out there fucking doing something about this" I fisted my hair again. "Ren, we have all our men on this. You'll get results, but right now your biggest job is getting through to Kat. The violence and other shit can wait" Rocco redirected my body to face the house. 

He wants me to go upstairs and try again. She's been inside with Grace for a bit, but I didn't like the damn way Kat last looked at me. That look in her eye...it was hateful.

"Gracy probably calmed her down" my brother nudged me. "You didn't see her face Rocco," I shook my head no. My insides feel like molten lava. I should be out there kicking doors in, scouring the streets, and knocking heads together. I should be finding the guy and killing him. I should have bloody knuckles by now. 

I feel trapped here. But that's the exact reason why Kat looked at me with such disdain. I am a violent man. I am a murderer. And now she knows it. 

        She'll never forgive this. She'll never be okay with the idea of a human life being taken away by another even if the mother fuckers deserved it. Even though these are some of the worst and lowest criminals who I've taken out, she will get stuck on the pointless details. 

'But it's a person' she'd say. This is the girl who saw a dirty, smelly, cracked out homeless man and offered him her bus money. She followed him into a dim restaurant, and shook his hand, and spoke with the man with such confidence that he was a decent guy. 

She doesn't see what's in front of her. How do I get it through her head that the men I killed are all killers themselves. I'm a goddamn anti-hero. I take out the bad guys just not for honorable reasons.

        "Renzo, go talk to her" my brother pushed this. Dante didn't say a word about it because he saw it too. She looked at him like he was a stranger to her, and I know Dante considers the girl a close friend. I know it hurt him. 

"Fuck it" I shrugged past them and walked back into the house. Up the steps one of my goons was already there as a guard even though we were just outside. They'll be a guard at every turn where Kat's involved. A fly won't be able to get within 50 feet of her, never mind an enemy.