TW: mention of abusive behaviors and trauma
"Mr LaRusso? I'm here?" I call as I walk into the empty dojo. I swear, he said 10... I'm here on time. I got here ten minutes ago and sat in the car, just to be safe. Is everything okay?
"Alright. Set your stuff down, take the floor," he instructs, entering from outside. I obey, slipping off my shoes as I walk to the middle of the dojo. I don't really know what's going on here. Like why is it just me? Am I falling behind? Did I do something wrong? If so, what is it? He would just tell me right? What's going on?
"Great, you wore the headband. Let me just make a slight adjustment... there. Now you're ready to train," Mr LaRusso says, pulling the fabric over my eyes. ¿Por qué? What's going on? I'm so confused.
"What-"
"Let's start with a kata to warm up. Just go all the way through it. You shouldn't hit anything,"
"Why am I blindfolded?"
"You'll see,"
"I'm pretty sure I won't,"
"Just run through the kata,"
I obey his instruction, running through the form. It's not like I can't do it with my eyes closed. I run through patterns this way when I know I'm really good at them, because the fact that I can do it blind means that I've grown confident enough in that pattern to know that I won't hit anything in my surroundings. I finish the pattern even more confused than I was before I started.
"What now? Can I take the blindfold off?" I ask. I just want some clarification as to what's going on here.
"Nope. Take a ready position," he says. Okay..? I do as he says, putting my hands up and taking a sparring stance. So... am I running a drill? I kind of need to see for that. You know, just a little.
Before I can do anything, Mr LaRusso has kicked me in the stomach and I go crashing to the ground.
"What the hell?!" I exclaim, pulling off the blindfold. How was I supposed to block that?! I can't see!
"Come on, put it back on, let's go again," he says. Increasingly confused and now a little annoyed, I put the headband back around my eyes and take a fighting position once again.
—-
I've been hit in the back, torso, stomach again, arms multiple times, and had my legs swept twice. What's the point of this stupid drill?! I rip off the blindfold in anger.
"¡Ay Dios mío! Che senso ha tutto questo?! (what's the point of all this)" I exclaim, "If you wanted to kick me around you could've just straight up told me instead of making me do this stupid excuse for a drill!"
"I want to help you turn an insecurity into a good thing," Mr LaRusso says. What the heck does that even mean?
"Mr LaRusso I don't see how me looking like a train wreck has anything to with karate," I say, getting more and more exasperated. I could be practicing for my competition but instead I'm here, getting kicked around by my sensei.
"I'm not talking about your physical insecurities. I mean your anxiety. Your paranoia. Things in your past have made you afraid. Did you notice that you didn't take a single hit to the head?" He says. Wait... I get to my feet, shocked with the realization.
"I want you to use that. Anticipate. I know you may question it, but trust your gut. I took away your sight because I want you to learn to adapt. I know you can. Listen for things. The rustle of clothing, the shuffle of feet on the floor. I know you can do it. You knew who I was by my footsteps and the sound of my keys. I believe in you," he says. I nod a little.
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