Holiday Getaway

The feels

Felix

Oh, my fucking god! What the actual fuck was that? Why do I feel like my insides are about to explode and why every time he touches me in some ways do I feel my heart beat a hundred miles per minute.

As soon as I pushed Minho off of me and ran to apparently the second-floor balcony I leaned against the railing trying to calm myself and catch my breath again. I shouldn't even feel anything let alone for him a guy, nonetheless. I can hear Chan now saying it doesn't matter who you are or who you love as long as you're happy.

My cousin was always the positive one and always helped me get through hard times and I was always so grateful for him, and I knew if I talked to him about this, he would definitely tease me about it. Knowing Chan, he had this planned out all along and I know he wanted to get me out and out of my slump.

Minho was different and in a good way, sure he acted full of himself just a bit but at the same time he was funny and cute and nice. I always fought myself on whether I was straight or bi even, but I don't think I am full on gay at least I don't think I am. I had my fair share of small but never lasting flings and my last relationship was my only ever serious one until it got fucked up and I got hurt. I know being intimate with a guy would be totally different and I just don't know if I'm ready for that even I mean hell I barely had sex the way it was and of course it didn't help that my ex cheated on me so of course she was getting it from elsewhere.

Before I could get too lost in my thoughts, I heard my name being called from downstairs, so I made my way down to the rambunctious group of boys in the living room.

"There he is!" Changbin yelled loudly. "And look who is drunk already." I rolled my eyes. "Eh you're no fun when you're sober Lix. Come on have a drink." I glared at Changbin but sat down next to Chan and he handed me a shot of Soju and then gave me a beer. "So where were you and Minho anyways?" Hyunjin glanced at me then at Minho. "I was outside in the back." Minho said nonchalantly. "And I was on the balcony upstairs." I replied. Not a total lie. "Sure, and I was out walking my fish." Changbin muttered.

As soon as that topic was dropped, we stayed up most of the night talking and drinking and thankfully no one brought up any drinking games to play. Hyunjin was passed out on the couch with Jisung on the other end ironically, that'll be interesting to wake up to in the morning. Chan took Jeongin upstairs and Seungmin was passed out on top of Changbin on the floor. Minho went up earlier saying he was tired and looking at the clock which was now 2 in the morning I made my way upstairs.

When I got inside the room Minho was fast asleep, I shut the door behind me and turned on the bedside lamp. I went to the bathroom to wash up and brush my teeth and changing into some comfy shorts and completely forgetting my shirt in the other room. Walking out shirtless wasn't a big deal as Minho was asleep so I said fuck it and just got into bed, I was too tired and lazy anyways.

I looked over at Minho whose lips were in a pout and his cheeks slightly puffy but cute and his messy tousled hair just covering his eyes. Damn why do you have to be so good looking even asleep.

I turned off the light and pulled the blanket over me and closing my eyes drifting off to sleep but not before I heard Minho mutter something.

"Lix, don't hurt me."

My heart didn't know how to take that, but I know that's something I don't know if I can do or not. Minho is fragile and I don't even know if I like him or not let alone making a promise not to hurt him.

But knowing me I'll promise to try and not to hurt you Minho.