Livid Love

"Bullshit"

It's slightly awkward as I enter the kitchen with my bag over my shoulder. Everyone is very aware of my presence. I pretend not to notice as I get some breakfast to eat before we take off. I've made more bad memories here than good but I thank Mary and James never less.

"We'll miss having your company"

"Thanks so much, it was lovely staying here"

"Not at all, the house will feel empty without ye"

I walk onto the helicopter without looking back, I take a seat far away from where Ghost is sitting, he doesn't look at me as I do. Everyone knows I'm not In the mood for talk today so they sit in their own places looking over at me ever now and then. The helicopter takes off and we enter the sunny oasis above the clouds. I don't know, something feels off about today, Price didn't explain the mission plan to me at all, well I can't blame him, I wouldn't walk into me to discuss tactics after what happened. I'll just ask him when we get there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Around an hour into the flight, Soap comes out from the bathroom and sits next to me

"How are you feeling now?"

"The same is yesterday, annoyed"

"You can't be annoyed at your man Soap are you?"

"No, it's Ghost I'm mad at" I lower my voice so he doesn't hear

"I don't see why you are mad at him, he is so worried about you and he was only trying to help"

"It didn't help"

"Oh, Y/n did you do something again"

"No don't worry"

I hear him exhale 

"Ok, look I know your mad at him, but I think you've hurt his feelings"

"How have I Hurt his feelings?"

"You're ignoring him lass"

"Think about all the times he's hurt my feelings!" My voice raises an octave and Price, who is closest to us turns his head to listen.

"True but...you know why he's like that"

I stay silent. He sits back in his original seat and goes on his phone. I probably look like an angry bitch at the moment, but that's what I am after all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We land an hour later on a beach, just as Price said

"Come on everyone, the house is this way"

We all follow him, I trail behind them not wanting any conversation. It's so warm here, I almost want to take off my jacket like everyone else, but I don't. We reach the house and I drop my bag outside the door walking in. It's pretty big.

"There's enough rooms for everyone this time so go pick a room" says Price

I take a left and I enter the sitting room, there's a couch, table and Tv in here with a window to the right of the couch. There's another door in here too I open it and enter the kitchen,  the other door in the hallway must lead to here too, theres a door in the kitchen that brings me to the bathroom, and it has a bath, I'll be using that a lot anyway. 

I go up stairs and see a corridor with 6 doors on either side as well as one door at the end. I look at that first and it's another bathroom, just upstairs. I take a peek into the room to the left of the bathroom door and it's a nice bedroom with a balcony. I look into the rest and notice the 3 front facing rooms have balconies and the other three don't. I put my stuff in the first room closest to the stairs on the balcony side. I open the two doors to the balcony and they are extremely squeaky and rusty, I almost have to shove the door open with my foot. I leave it open to let some air in as I unpack my stuff into the drawers on the opposite wall to my bed.

I need to buy some food and other things so I head back downstairs to go to the markets In town. The town is lovely, there's children running around and people selling all kinds of  things in little wooden stalls all along the street. I stop at an ice cream stand to buy some strawberry ice cream, I continue walking around until I find a small hardware shop further into the town. I look around and I find some WD-40 to fix the hinges of the doors. I line up at the till and pay for it while finishing the last bit of the waffle cone.

"Eighteen euros por favor"

"Eighteen?!"

"Si si"

I sigh and hand the woman the money, things here are expensive as hell. I continue walking down the streets until I stumble across a nice park with a small pond with little goldfish swimming around inside it. I sit on a bench admiring the nice weather and the birds singing, it's a nice change from the 24/7 rain and cold in Ireland.

I start walking back to the house after a while, I find an old chair outside the back and I bring it upstairs with me, I put it on my balcony, this way I can watch the sunsets every night while we are here. I spray the two doors with the WD-40 and they start working just fine again. I knock on the door of the room beside me, Ghost opens the door.

"Here, for the door hinges" I say not making eye contact 

"Thanks" he mumbles closing the door

I take a seat at the kitchen table where everyone is gathered around and I tune into their conversation,

"I don't want any mess ups ok boys?"

"Yup yup" they say in unison

"Ah y/n..." says Price "We were just discussing your...situation and we think it's best if you just take a break for this time, don't worry, you can be in the next mission if we don't catch Hassan this time but please don't be angry, it's just for the best"

"What" I say flatly, "Is it because I got put to sleep last time? Because that wasn't my fault!"

"No we know that and it's not that, it's...I think it would be good to give your mental health a rest for a while, after what happened"

"I don't need you all discussing me like I'm a child! I'll be fine"

Price shakes his head a little 

"Please Y/n just listen to us for once"

The men at the table are all looking at me with pity on their faces, I stand up shoving my chair back and I run upstairs.

*bang* *bang* *bang*

Ghost opens the door and before he can say anything, I barge in

"This is all your fault, now I'm not allowed go on this fucking mission!"

"I-"

"I don't want to hear it! You know you shouldn't have told them but you did"

"Y/n I seriously only meant to help you get better by doing that but they seemed to have something else in mind! You're acting as if I'm doing this on purpose to hurt you!"

"You fucked up!" I shout

" I know I did and I'm sorry"

"Sorry isn't changing anything! I came on this campaign to fight! Not to be babied around by a bunch of men thinking I'm not strong enough to box a few people in the face and shoot a man in the head." I stand below him crossing my arms and glaring up at him.

"How many fucking times do I have to tell you!?! I'm not doing it to hurt you!" 

"Bullshit!" I scream

The door flies open, banging off the wall behind it, leaving me and Ghost frozen in place in front of one another 

"What the fuck are you two arguing about now!?"

I'm not dealing with Price again, I walk by him through the doorway and into my own room, almost slamming the door. I'm absolutely furious with him. Why is he such a fucking dick!