My name is Blair young I was born in London but I'm from Glasgow and I'm currently 17 years old. My story starts here because although a lot has happened in my life this is where it's gonna start to get better. I can feel it.
I've just stepped ont...
We got back to the hotel and went straight for tea. We all sat round in our usual groups chatting about the party tonight.
"Who'd you think is getting the most drunk?" Grace asks.
"Mhmm well not Blair anyway are you even legal yet?" Laura laughs.
"Well technically I'm not but I don't drink either way so it's definitely not gonna be me." I say.
"You don't drink? I never knew that." Jade says curiously.
"Yeah how come?" Grace questions.
"Ehh well I guess I've just seen the negative sides of alcohol in the past." I admit.
"Ohh really what happened?" Laura asks.
I don't really wanna talk about this. It makes me uncomfortable.
"Nothing really I just knew someone who had a bad experience with it." I say being purposefully vague.
I think they get the hint I don't wanna talk about it and conversation moves onto more light topics.
Once we have finished up tea we go back to our rooms to get ready for the night.
"I literally have nothing to wear." Jade complains.
I glance at the pile of clothes on her bed and laugh internally at the irony. Picking an outfit for me to wear is easy as I literally have like one pair of Jeans and a couple T-shirts to choose from.
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Blair's outfit ^^
***
Jade has finally picked an outfit she deems appropriate so we go to join the others in the team room.
We chat amongst ourselves for hours just laughing and sharing memories from the trip. I'm having a good time but I start to feel a pit building in my stomach. I realise how much I'm gonna miss these girls I have always had my guard up since everything that happened and I never let anyone in. Now I have and I don't know when I'm going to see them again.
"Right girls listen up." Rachel calls us to listen. "I think we should go around and share our favourite memory from the tour and then what we are most looking forward to when we go home."
"Laura you better go first before you're too drunk to remember." Grace laughs.
"Okay favourite memory was Jade spilling her smoothie down her at breakfast right before training." Everyone laughed along. "And I'm most looking forward to having a brew every morning with my mum."
Everyone shares their memory when it's their turn some funny and some game moments. Most people go on to mention they are most excited to go home and see friends, family or loved ones.
I start to feel overwhelmed so slip away from the group whispering to Jade I'm just going to the toilet.
I just needed to take a breather. I've been so caught up in keeping busy with the tournament I had completely put off thinking about what I was going to do when we got back.
I stare into the mirror in the toilets my face is red and my eyes watering. I take deep breaths I've already cried too much this trip which is not actually like me I usually manage to keep everything in and power through.
I'm hardly holding it together when a toilet flushes. I didn't even notice anyone was in here. I wipe my eyes quickly trying to cover up my tears.
"Blair what's happening." Jen says as she comes out and sees me with my head in my hands.
I turn around wiping my tears a final time.
"Nothing I'm fine." I try to say convincingly.
"Blair I can tell you're not okay." Jen says coming over. "Let's get out of here and talk, yeah?"
"Alright." I say slightly defeated.
Jen leads me down to the seating area in reception.
"Right what's happening kid?" Jen asks.
"Pffft I don't even know, I'm just anxious like everyone is talking about who they're going home too and it reminds me I have no home and no one." I explain defeated.
"Blair do you not think we should maybe tell someone?" Jen asks cautiously.
"No, absolutely not." I say firmly. "Jen it was hard enough telling you and I'm so grateful for you and how you've been such a good friend to me but I'm not ready to tell anyone and I don't know if I ever will."
"Okay Blair I'm not going to make you if you don't want to I just wanna do what's best for you."
"I know. I just wanna say thank you Jen you've really helped me in these past few weeks."
"Always kid. Bidh mi an seo dhut gu bràth." Jen says. (I will always be here for you.)
"Tapadh leibh Jen." I reply as Jen gives me a reassuring hug. (Thanks Jen)
"Don't stress about what's happening at home we'll sort something out." Jen adds.
***
After we return to the party it ends up being quite a good night. Jade is extremely drunk by the end of the night so I help her up to our room and into bed.
I fall asleep quickly after a long day. I'm going to have a lie in tomorrow as we aren't having breakfast till later then usual seen as it's our last day here.
