Destiel One Shots

Destiel ~ Are You Afriad

A/N: listen to the song while reading, trust me.

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The air was cold and frigid in the bunker. Dean sat in the bed, his head in his hands. He felt dead inside. He felt choked.

"Cas. Please, just answer me." Dean begged. He fucked up this time, really. Cas had, had enough. He was done with doing everything for Dean, who never said so much as a fucking thank you. "I messed up, I know I did. Cas, please." Dean felt something pool at his cheek and he wiped it away.

Sam was gone, working on a case, and Dean was here, alone. All alone. He knew he would be one day. He got to his feet and went to the bathroom, looking in the mirror. He looked terrible. His face was red, bags under his tired eyes, no light in his eyes. The beautiful green was swallowed with misery, turning almost a sickening shade of vomit.

His hair was a mess, so we're his clothes. He couldn't stand it, he smashed the mirror, not caring if it hurt, he went to his room, throwing the lamp, distorting frames, destroyed everything in sight until everything was in shambles. Then, Dean Winchester did something he though he would never do. He cried, hard. Not a single man tear, but full out sobbing.

It shook his body as the wet tears welled up in his eyes. He fell on the bed, feeling the tears falling, pooling on his cheeks. He wanted to cry his problems away, and that made it worse. He couldn't help that inside, it was twisted and tormented, torn to pieces. He was missing something important, he was missing his other half. Cas.

He never thought one name could bring him so much pain, but it did. It screamed at him and said cruel things. He hated it. He hated picturing Cas being happy, he hated seeing him sad. He hated that the angel refused to answer his calls, and he was loosing hope. A scream of pain escaped his lips, rumbling in the back of his throat, the sound the worst thing.

"Cas- I need you." Dean kept sobbing. He got up, leaving his room, he was going to drink his problems away if e could. He hoped he could, because this pain was unbearable. The pain of being rejected by the person he loved the most. It strangled him and forced him to become a mess. Dean wiped away his tears, yanking the fridge door open, seeing beer and whiskey. He grabbed the whiskey, the alcohol a bit stronger. Dean opened the bottle and brought it to his lips, but something stopped him. The flutter of wings.

"Dean, don't." Cas' rough voice begged. He sounded just as broken as Dean. Dean turned towards Cas to see him with messy hair and a tear tracked face. His eyes were puffy and he looked tired. Dean set down the whiskey, closing the fridge.

"C-cas, I'm so sorry." Dean choked out, his face looking tormented. Cas walked over and hugged Dean, holding him closer than before. He closed his eyes and buried his face in Dean's shirt. Dean held close, not wanting to let go.

"It's okay. I forgive you." Cas whispered. They stood like that for minutes, neither one wanting to let go. But, if they held longer, they would have to come into terms with things they weren't ready to. Cas pulled away, still looking stressed.

"Thank you Cas for everything you do for me and Sam. Thank you for saving us. Thank you for sacrificing so much. I'm sorry I'm a dick and can't thank you. I'm sorry that I act so stupidly. I'm sorry for being a terrible friend." Dean apologized, and he meant every word.

"Apology accepted. A thank you every once in awhile is nice." Cas smiled softly.

"I don't know what I'd do without you Cas." Dean sighs, finding himself standing in Cas' personal space. Well, that was different. He never even minded it that much when Cas invaded his personal space. He was just itching to reach out for him.

"Most likely drinking your problems away." Cas comments.

"You're a real smart ass sometimes." Dean chuckles.

"So my ass is smart?" Cas questions confusedly.

"No, Cas. It's a figure of speech." Dean sighed again.

"Oh." Cas didn't really seemed that surprised. He leant into Dean subconsciously, Dean doubted Cas knew he was doing it.

"Cas, personal space." Dean mumbled.

"I have to tell you something." Cas says out of the blue.

"What is it?" Dean questions, afraid of the possible outcomes.

"There's this...... person I've developed a crush on." Cas began.

"Oh?" Dean questions.

"Well, maybe I'm in love with this person. But, they're a guy." Dean felt his heart stop momentarily at those words.

"That's nice." Dean smiled.

"And well. Dean, it's you. I'm in love with you." Dean felt his heart skip a beat as he looked at Cas with a shocked expression. "It was stupid to tell you, I should've known you wouldn't feel the same." Cas looked like he was about to leave, so Dean grabbed him and held him close.

"Cas you idiot. I love you too." The words were bubbly and happy and it felt nice to get them off his chest. Cas smiled softly and went to grab Dean's hands. They stood there like fools, smiling kindly and sweetly. Dean brought his hands to Cas' face, his fingers tracing patters on his skin. Cas leant into the touch, his eyes closing.

They liked the silence, they didn't feel any pressure to kiss or have sex or any of that. They just wanted to hold each other closely and never let go. Dean pressed a kiss to Cas' forehead, pulling his into a hug again. They embraced, holing tightly and being sure to be gentle and caring. When they embrace was over, they went to sit on the couch. They didn't really know what to do, so they turned on the television and Dean rested his head in Cas' lap. Cas just played with the ends of his hair.

"I don't know how to navigate this relationship." Cas said after some time.

"Well, I'm glad you agree this is a relationship. And I have no idea how to navigate this too. I guess we'll have to figure it out as we go." Dean sighed, looking at his beautiful angel. His. The very sound was soothing.

"I guess we will." Cas closed his eyes, a smile of content on his face. Sure, Dean could tell Cas was crying, he hated that he must have been the reason, but seeing his angel smile made his stomach do flips and explode in fireworks.

"Cas, will you be my boyfriend?" Dean questions.

"I thought I already was your friend?" Cas questions.

"No, Cas. Boyfriend means your partner. Someone you're dating who is a guy." Dean explained.

"Oh, then yes, I would like to be your boyfriend." Cas nods. Dean can't help but grin.

"You're too adorable for your own good." Dean informed. The rest of the night was filled with watching cheesy movies and being in each other's company.

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A/N: Oh look, fluff!