The Badboy's Heartbeat [BxB] √

CHAPTER 78

XAVIER ROCKWELL

My heartbeat was rising almost steadily as I keep on staring at the message. I could feel my heart going berserk on my chest and it's not even on a positive note. I've been playing this video that was sent to me by an unknown person and I'm slowly getting convinced that the person I was watching was Jordi. He said he was in drag last time and I'm definitely seeing him under this wig and this gorgeous head-turning make up. He looked absolutely snatched and painted for the gods and instead of feeling rather excited to see him in this full on regalia, I was more than disappointed to watch what happened. What I was watching was truly world shattering, heartbreaking, tear jerking and many more.

Jordi just kissed Zach Riley. If it was just a simple kiss I would've probably be fine with it since I know Zach's the hottest guy that I know and also, Jordi's probably had a cup of alcohol or two. But when I started to notice it wasn't just a kiss, I felt hurt. Jordi kissed Zach so aggressively and passionately that I was flabbergasted watching it. Jordi seemed like he's been dreaming of kissing Zach all this time and I don't know if it was even true but that's how I saw things.

I truly don't know how would I feel about it. I'm undeniably hurt by what I just watched but I also feel like my world's getting shattered in million smithereens and my mind's really fucking with me right now. That was my boyfriend right on the video and I just suddenly remembered this was the very same night that Jordi asked me to be his boyfriend. I don't know if he asked me before he went on and kissed Zach or if he did after. That was a question that I'm trying to figure out but also, I'm confused as to why he did this shit. I'm astronomically rattled and the situation just got even worse than I was anticipating.

I got on my feet, grabbed the bottle of whiskey and the next thing I know; I was already chugging it. I don't even need a glass to drink the whiskey that I bought. I just had to chug it until I feel nothing. I didn't know I was already breaking down into tears until I was on the ground breathing heavily. I never realize Jordi could do this to me and I'm not just going to accept it. He's an angel to me and now I'm starting to think he's been playing me. I cried for a while until I suddenly decided to throw the half full bottle of whiskey right onto the wall.

I hugged my knees and just started crying and after a while, I just had this idea. I picked up myself up and walked out of the place thinking of going somewhere else to distract myself. I thought I needed some time to be alone that's why I chose not to drive to Jordi's house but I was dead ass wrong about that. I definitely don't need the presence of silence right now. My mind's like a salad bowl just now and it's filled with a mixture of problems. I'm thinking of the scene my dad created and how it's going to affect me and then there's this video of Jordi kissing Zach motherfucking Riley. Why does all of these have to pile on me all in one night?

I was walking through the streets not really knowing where to go until I found myself entering this bar. I thought I was lucky that no one even tried to ask me for any identification because I really wanted some place noisy. I'm utterly eager to drown all of my thoughts and feelings with noise and more alcohol. I walked straight towards the counter and ordered myself another shot of whiskey.

"You new here?" The bartender asked me as soon as he handed me my drink.

"Me?" I asked and he nodded. "I-I just moved here a couple of weeks ago. I live at the nearest condominium."

"Aahhh. You look very young for someone who's living in that condo." He replied. "Let me guess, you're a CEO of a new company?"

"Naaah. My dad just got me that space."

"Ohhh, okay." He seemed quite surprised.

I gulped my whiskey until it was empty. "One more please!"

"Damn, you look like you really need a lot of drinks. Life's getting hard on you, huh?"

"Oh, I do. I've got a lot of things going on at the moment and I just want get fucking wasted right now."

"Hey," The bartender leaned on over towards me. "I've got something here that could really help you get wasted." He whispered and the look on his face made me realize he's hustling.

"Naaah. If that's drugs, I'm going to pass on that, man." I quickly replied. I'm aware of this pain and uneasiness that I'm going through but I'm still very much in the right mind to decline this skeptical offer. I don't want to be like my mother. I don't want to go down the rabbit hole, perhaps because I don't have any guarantee that someone would pull me out of it. "I'm all good."

"It's not drugs... Okay, listen to me. Do you see that chick right there?" The bartender pointed right at this woman at the furthest part. She was wearing a top that's just covering her chest, her hair was tied up into a high ponytail and gave such a nice view of everything that's attractive to her.

"Yeah, I'm not looking for anything other than alcohol tonight." I intoned eventually chugging my whiskey.

I just shut the bartender off because I'm not interested in anything that he's trying to offer me. I do want to keep our conversation going but he seemed very much assertive at offering me lots of stuff that I don't even want.

I continued drinking not really knowing how much alcohol I've had. It was actually effective. Having the buzzing noise around did a perfect job a making me forget about everything. The thoughts are drowned but I still feel horrible. My heart's been steadily sinking ever since I received that video of my boyfriend kissing someone else that's not me. I just want to let the horrible feeling drown using the power of alcohol. After a while, I started to feel the effect of alcohol in my system as my vision started to go blurry. This is what I came for.

Eventually, a guy came over and sat right beside me. He was looking rather cute and I don't know if that's only because I was drunk or if he's truly cute. He seemed alone and that's when I started to introduce myself. We had a nice conversation going and I found myself really starting to get distracted by the guy. He was really funny and I learned that he's already thirty even though he looked like he's just in his early twenty's. We took the time to get to know each other, basically a small talk but I found him very entertaining. I ordered him drinks and we just talked and talked until he started to show little hints that he's trying to hit on me. At one point during our conversation, his hand got on my thigh and that's how I knew he's definitely looking for something.

The time ticked by and suddenly, I just asked him to my place. I know I was drunk but I'm definitely not in the right mind and that's all because I had one too many drinks. I just feel like I want to have some fun tonight and maybe a little bit of like this would help me forget about Jordi and the rest of my predicament.

I eventually found myself kissing the guy on the elevator. I was pretty much aggressive like I've been hoping to kiss someone. I'm definitely not myself tonight. By the time we got inside my unit, I pinned the guy against the door and started kissing him. I made my tongue slither inside him mouth and he was very much talented just as I was. While I was kissing him, I began to undress myself but then I heard something ringing. It was his phone.

"Hold on!" The guy began. "My boyfriend's calling."

"You have a boyfriend?" I was more than shocked to hear him mention he have a boyfriend. I thought he was single. I almost immediately got a sense of reality. This is wrong, I told thought to myself.

"I do. We ar..."

"Get the fuck out of here!" I blurted out.

"BU—"

"I SAID GET OUT!" I screamed at the top of my lungs fully aware that I'm about to cheat on my boyfriend over something that I watched. I seemingly scared off the guy as he scampered out of my place.

I shut the door and then the next thing I know; I was already breaking down into tears. I know Jordi cheated on me and I'm thoroughly hurt by that but that doesn't mean I have to do the same thing in return.