The Badboy's Heartbeat [BxB] √

CHAPTER 83

XAVIER ROCKWELL

"I know you've already watched the video." Jordi's voice reverberated from behind as I was pulling a clean shirt to wear. He finally decided to start the topic.

I closed my eyes, paused and took a quick breath before eventually agreeing to what he just uttered. "Yes, I did."

"I was drunk that night, Xavier. A-and I don't know what I was doing." Jordi went on pulling the I'm-drunk-and-I-didn't-know-what-I-was-doing card on me. "I gave in to the temptation and I am very... very... very sorry for what I did."

I turned around looked at him in the eye with a straight face and it's as if I wasn't affected by what he was confessing to me. I started slipping on my shirt. "Of course I know you were drunk. You're at a party. You should be drunk."

Jordi was staring at me and I don't what was going through his head because I'm not giving him any sort of emotion. "You sound like you're..."

"Like what?" I immediately cut him off knowing he's about to describe my current situation. I pulled out my undergarments and began slipping on them.

"I-I'm sorry, Xavier. I mean it. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you about it as soon as I got the chance. I was just scared to lose you, babe. You're the love of my life and I just got really scared because I don't know h-how or when to say it." I could clearly hear how Jordi's voice was cracking up the void and even though a part of my soul wanted to drop the stoic act, the heartless part of me clearly had the upper hand.

"Yeah, apology accepted." I groaned out with a straight face.

Jordi was just staring deep into my eyes. "You sound like you're over it... You sound like you're not... you."

"Psh..." I scoffed into a chuckle simply shaking what he said off of my shoulder. "It's me. I haven't changed, bro. This is still me."

"Xavier..."

"What else do you want to talk about?" I asked having already felt done with this conversation. I guess part of me being done with this was because I don't want to just lose the act and be a mess.

"Are we going to fix this?" He inquired.

I paused for a while, the look on his face was genuinely asking me if we are going to settle this. I thought I was going to say something else and I did. "I mean, yeah. We've already fixed it. You came here, you apologized and I accepted your apology. That's it. Let's call it quits."

"W-what do you mean?"

"We're done." I smiled at him keeping my face straight although deep inside, I'm a mess. I don't want to cry right in front of him. I think I've cried one too many times right in front of him and this time, I shouldn't be crying. This wasn't my fault.

"No..." He exclaimed and paused before eventually shedding a tear. "T-this can't be happening, Xavier. I love you so much. You're my... life."

"Psh, come on, Jordi. Get over it."

"GET OVER IT?!" Jordi screamed out. Of course, I was also startled that I managed to say that phrase but I'd rather stand by it.

Thankfully, Tristan finally arrived. The knocking on the door was loud enough for both Jordi and I to hear.

"Oh, hold on, someone's knocking." I walked out of the room.

Before I opened the door, I had to take a moment to breathe. That conversation was inevitably intense and I was right all along. If it took way longer than that and Jordi broke down and went on his knees before me, I probably would've dropped the act. I had to be tough on the outside, that's how I learned to live. I also wanted to see Jordi feel the pain. It's not the same but at least, I'm not the only one locked down in a miserable universe.