The Badboy's Heartbeat [BxB] √

CHAPTER 98

XAVIER ROCKWELL

The day of the funeral came just as quickly as I lost my own mother and honestly speaking, I wasn't, in any means, ready to get up from my bed and slip unto something somber and black. I only had a two hours of sleep because I spent the entire night quietly sobbing inside my room. After all, it is the only time that I could cry and cry and really cry hard without thinking about nobody.

I couldn't stop thinking about my mom and how I should've been present for her. I am absolutely aware of the lingering fact that she was struggling and I was entirely glad that she finally decided to checked herself into a rehab. However, you don't really know what's going on inside people's mind even if they say they're fine and they say they're ready for a change. I don't really have any sort of idea if my mom just gave into the temptation of the outside world or if Hector somehow managed to talk her out if or even possibly bribed her with something or if she just missed sniffing powdered stuff and smoking pot.

I wanted to put the blame on myself knowing that talking to my mom was as important as feeding some milk to an infant. I should've been the responsible and loving son and visited her every single day that she was inside the rehabilitation center. I would've probably talked her out of something. I could've actually convinced her to stop seeing and communicating with that asshole Hector if she truly wanted to obtain sobriety.

There's just a lot of things that could've happened had I been present in those times that she was giving up on the temptation brought upon by such depressants and psychedelics. If I was there, things would've worked out in our favor. Maybe in the next month I'd finally be spending the rest of my life with a sober mother and we'll be living a happy and healthy life together. Maybe I would've ran away from my dad to live a simple life with my mom. Maybe my mom would finally file the divorce towards my dad and accept the absolute reality that he's got his own family.

I was truly fantasizing about my mom redeeming herself and actually being a changed woman. However, I should stop dreaming of such thing because it's clearly not going to happen in this timeline.

My head was just riddled with a lot of regrets, questions and more so, what ifs. I ended up drinking some alcohol just so the mercy of drowsiness visits me. However, the only thing it did was to make me cry even harder.

The loud knocking on my door became the entire reason for me to get up. When I opened my door, I was frankly bewildered to see my sister Xiomara on the doorway out of all people.

"Hey." She smiled sheepishly and I was even more surprised that she was already wearing a black dress for the occasion. As I was thinking, this is actually her style. She's a goth and she loves everything dark and black. She must be happy about it.

"W-what are you doing here?" I inquired obviously perplexed. I know she hated all of me more than anybody in this mansion. If she came here to laugh and read me to filth, it's not the right time. I'm going to punch her in the face if that's what if takes for her to leave me the fuck alone.

"I came here to apologize," She began. "I-I'm sorry about everything. I was really being a bitch towards you for no reason. I hope you can forgive me for being such an asshole."

I was quiet for a mere second thinking if this was truly happening or not but then when I looked into her eyes, I saw how sincere she was and maybe this wasn't the time to be an asshole too. "I... Yeah, it's fine. I was once an asshole to someone too, I get where you are coming from. I accept your apology."

"Thanks. I'm really sorry about your mom. I can only imagine what you are currently going through."

"T-thank you, Xiomara. I appreciate it, I really do." I breathed out.