4-7: Helplessness (Spider 75)

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Spider 75:

{ The bell rang.

I can go home now.

I walked out of my home classroom, to avoid spending any more time than I have to with my classmates.

I kept my gaze down, to avoid looking at people's faces, with their judgmental eyes.

I hear laughter, are they laughing at me? Am I walking weird or something?

No, no, don't think about it, it's just the audience effect tormenting me again.

Someone: "I still don't get how that weirdo got top scores in so many tests."

Someone else: "Don't worry, those talents are wasted on her anyway, how well she performs now doesn't matter."

Can you at least wait until I am out of earsight to say that?

Nai wa, I hate that I agree with what they said.

I was making my way down the stairs when-

???: "Hey stop! Give it back!"

I looked down the hallway to find the one who said that.

A wheelchair-bound lower classman, shouting at another boy holding a book above him, surrounded by other boys.

Lead Bully: "Hahaha, look at you, can't even reach that high to get your book back."

Victim: "It's not funny, you sick-"

"Fucks!"

I shouted as I tried to yank the book out of the lead bully's hand.

But I am too weak, and struggled to even drag his arm down.

He just smirked at me.

Oh yeah? Let's see you handle my entire body weight then!

I kicked off his legs without letting go of the book, the total moment from his legs being pushed away and his arm dragged towards me is enough to get him off balance.

As he stumbled, I let gravity do the rest, forcing his arm down.

Once I had a decent amount of downward momentum, I yanked the book down and finally got it out of his hand as he fell to the ground.

I was about to go return the book to the victim when the lead bully got back up, now backed up by his goons.

Lead Bully: "What do you think you are doing?! Know your place you autistic bitch! Or else we are going to pin you down and make you regret it!"

Pin me down!?

Oh god! Rape!?

They are going to rape me!?

No no no no no no no no no no no no!

I threw a punch towards his face, but being weak as I am, the hit barely registered.

A quick back hand to my face and I fell to the ground head first.

Gah!

I woke up, finding myself in the bed in the nurse's office with a killer headache.

My head was bandaged up, and I have bruises all over.

I was soon told that I actually went on to fight for a while longer after hitting the ground for the first time, not that I remember anything after that point.

Guess I blanked out from the stress.

I technically started the fight, but this won't go on my record.

They say it was because of the implied threat of rape and the fact that I was trying to help someone being bullied that I got off scot free.

But I know better, had I been a boy going up against girls, they are most likely going to get away with the threats while I will be charged with assault or something.

It's not that they care about creating an environment that values justice and equality, if they did, the bullying probably won't be allowed to take place in the first place.

No, they just wanted to avoid trouble with the public opinions in today's cultural / political climate, they don't actually give a damn about making things better for the children that have to grow up and inherit this world from the old.

And there is nothing I can do, when it comes down to it I am powerless, helpless at the mercy of others.

I really should just give up already. }

...

My eyes open to find myself in the Lower Stratum, still looking for a way out of that shithole.

Nai wa, I did not want to relive that, but my brain hates me or something.

Oh well, back on track then.

But suddenly, the ground shook and I tripped.

Then fire, fire at the two ends of the tunnel I am in.

And they are getting closer.

Oh god! Oh no!

No no no!

How am I supposed to escape this?!

I am going to burn to death!

Please! I don't want to die!

A huge shadow then looms over me.

I anxiously turned around, to find That staring me down.

It then begins charging a Dragon Breathe, aimed at me.

...

I just sat there, I mean, what can I even do at this point?

In the end, it matters not what I do with my life, all that will await me is a painful, lonely, meaningless death.

Heh, if nothing matters, then all my failures to live up to expectations, all my dreams that are dashed, all the time I wasted not amending my life, it all washes away.

I can at least find some comfort in that, knowing my worthlessness to not be a concern in the slightest.

That fired its attack at me, and the last thing I felt was being burnt and torn apart.

Pain, absolute, agonising pain.

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