UNSPOKEN WORDS

Chapter 29

JUDAH

  I woke up when I heard some voices talking. When I fully open my eyes I see my bed done (since I am sleeping in another bed) My room it's clean and organized. But no Cherry.

"So you put the butter first?"
"Yes... You're a slow learner. Are you?" I heard my mother say.
"Only when the teacher doesn't know how to teach," Cherry says. Then they laughed.
Why are they laughing?

I stand up from bed. I grab my wand and then I transfigured the bed back into my desk. I quickly go downstairs only to see my Mom and Cherry cooking. It smells delicious. But the point here is that they are together having a decent time.
  Cherry was the one who looked at me first. She slightly smiled at me. Then I remembered what happened yesterday. My chest hurt.

"Judah is here," she says to my mother. I feel slightly hurt since she didn't say a word to me.
"Ah, Good morning sweetheart! How did you sleep?"
My mother asked while serving me a plate of pancakes.
"Good, mother... Good morning Cherry" I say getting a cup of organic juice.
"Morning... Angelina, I'm going out today... Do you need anything from the store?" Cherry says completely dismissing me. More pain in my heart.
"Not really... have fun," my mother says to Cherry. Cherry smiled then she began to walk away. Before she can leave I grab her hand. I didn't have the chance to say anything since she pulled away and left the kitchen to go upstairs to our room.

I look down trying not to cry. Then I grab my plate full of food my mother cooked.
I took a sit at the table and tried to eat. I couldn't. I hate being so sentimental. I hate that I say those words to her.
"Sweetheart go talk to her" I heard my mother say
"What?" When She finished with the food, she looked at me
"You like her, don't you?"
I look down at my food and shake my head
"Don't lie to your mother" I look at her
"I do... I like her so much... but... she doesn't like me, she has a boyfriend and... I'm her best friend" my mother took a sit in front of me.
"You are just like your father...go talk to her, it's an order" I smiled and nodded. I stand up from my seat and go upstairs. My mother used to be in the military when she was younger. Every time she says 'it's an order it's like saying 'I know what's best for you, please do it

I slowly opened the door of my room. I step inside closing the door behind me. I see Cherry looking for a shirt, perhaps she is making her outfit for today.
"Need help?" I asked trying to sound friendly
"No thank you," she says firmly, I walk towards her. And I noticed she wasn't making an outfit. She was packing.
"Why are you packing?" I say grabbing some of her clothes and putting them out of the suitcase.
"Put it back," she says putting her clothes back, I take them out again.
"No.. why are you packing?" I asked again.
"Because I'm leaving," she says finally looking at me.
"W-why?" I clear my throat, not wanting to sound as if I wanted to cry.
"You said you didn't want me to bring you into my mess... so I'm leaving, That way you can keep having this perfect life you have."

She says continuing to pack. I stopped her by grabbing her hands but she pushed me away.
"Get away from me Snape!" She yelled at me.
She steps forward and glares at me. She is looking at me with anger, my heart is breaking. Please don't break my heart Cherry
"You want to know something Snape!... you are pathetic! ... always showing your fucking good side, for what?! For me to like you?! Is that what you want!.. you are a worthless piece of shit who doesn't do more than live in a world of fantasies thinking he'll find love... You won't ever find love! Because I will never love you!... you'll die alone!"
  With each word she said to me tears came out of my eyes. I look at her sobbing.

"Please say you don't mean it..." I say looking at her while tears come out of my eyes. I look at her. She is fighting her tears. Clenching her fist.  But staying in silence.
"SAY YOU DON'T MEAN IT!! APOLOGIZE!!" I yelled at her making her flinch. I step closer to her.
"Do YOU want to know something, Cherry?!... I don't care! I don't care about all those awful things you say to me, because you don't know how to control your dirty mouth!... and yes! Yes! I always show my good side because that's the only side I have! Unlike you!.. You are a bad person!... cheating on your boyfriend and not regret it!? And you call me pathetic?! ... you're always seeking attention... and I'm not going to say you'll die without love... because I'm sure! I AM SURE THAT  I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!!"

Silence.

She looked at me while small tears came out of her eyes. I feel myself shaking because of how much I want to cry. But I need to remain strong.
"Tom said he loved me... you're not..."
"The only one? I am aware... but I know you feel something for me too." She looked up at me, stepped closer to me, and softly grabbed my cheek
"I am no good for you Judah, Please, please let me go," she says sobbing
"No," I say then pull her into a kiss. But she didn't kiss me back. I kept on kissing her, she didn't kiss me back.
"Please," I say against her lips.
"Please," I say again. I kiss her again but she is not kissing me. I stopped kissing her and slowly kneeled hugging her by her waist. I don't want to let her go.

My whole life I've been finding myself in this position. But I am sure Cherry is the one for me. Why can't she realize we belong together? I can make her the happiest girl in the world. We can get married, start a family, and grow together.
I need her so much but why is she not realizing this? Why can't she hold me and kiss me? Why did no one ever choose me?

"Judah," she says. I look up at her still hugging her waist while I'm on my knees.
"Please don't leave me Cherry... you're the only good thing in my life" I feel her hands grabbing mine. Then she removes them from her waist. She slowly kneels in front of me.
She grabbed my face and pulled me into a small loving kiss. I kiss her back after a second. I pulled her closer from the back of her neck. She pulls me closer by my shirt. We kiss, our second kiss. For some reason, this kiss feels even more special. Perhaps because it's a secret.

It feels like our love is a rule meant to be broken.

We slowly pull away and look at each other eyes. She cleaned my tears and kissed my lips again. And again. And again. Until we are trying to remove both of our clothes on the floor of my room. I kiss her neck and she touches my chest softly. We are naked now on the floor of my room. She is on top of me. I feel her position me on her entrance. She looks at me.
"Tell me to stop," she says
"I don't want you to stop"
She lowered herself and I closed my eyes when I was in her. My hand goes to her waist and I press harder. This is a different type of feeling. I feel her moving on top of me. I heard her moans and I grunted and moaned. Heavy breathing, our sweaty bodies collapsing, and moaning. We kept on this for a few more minutes until we reached our end.

We look at each other and she stands up. I stand up as well. We are naked looking at each other directly at our eyes.
"I love..."
"Please don't say it." She interrupted me, then she kissed me. I kissed her back.
"I got to go," she says against my lips
"Please come back," I say kissing her neck
"I will." I smiled and hugged her body against mine.

At this moment, I don't care about the consequences of my actions. This feels Right. She has that talent of making me feel okay, even if she is taken I feel honored she decided to share some piece of her with me. I will never forget this special moment. Even if she is my best friend, I love her. 

Bring me into your beautiful mess Cherry.