forty-five; accepting his fate

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I thought I saw the light. I'm sure I saw the light.

The light people talk about when they're near death. For a moment I felt nothing, I was numb. I twitch my fingers but even that hurts. My lungs feel constricted and I haven't convinced myself to open my eyes yet because I'm not sure I can.

I have no energy. I'm exhausted. Why am I so exhausted?

My body flinches and I hiss at a sizzle on my skin. That's when I snap my eyes open to find myself in complete darkness. Terrifying darkness.

At first I thought my eyes hadn't adjusted yet. That's when I realise I was wrong.

What the fuck?

Where the hell am I?

I move my body again and my dry lips part, I exhale a groan of pain. My eyes blink rapidly trying to gauge where I am. My back flat against something hard and uncomfortable, even my shoulder blades dig into the harshness of it.

My jaw grinds and I shift again.

A roar of pain sizzles down my spine and I cry out.

Then I panic.

My body shifts from side to side but I'm stuck. Trapped.

"No," the word falls from my lips in a pathetic murmur. "No."

I somehow glance down in the tiny space. This must be a joke. It has to be a joke. My hands are tied together with silver, my wrists ache as if they've been cut into for hours.

My heart rate increases and I flick my eyes around frantically. I raise my wrists and bite down a wince. My knuckles instantly collide with something hard above me.

Fuck. I can't breathe.

"Hello?" I scream heavily. "Hello?!"

I'm met by silence but the sound of my body shaking against the deathtrap I'm in amplifies. I slam my hands against the roof of whatever is enclosed around me but it doesn't budge, I'm ignoring the pain in my hands. Now I attempt to move my feet but they hurt just as bad.

My lips tremble. "Oh God," I choke out. "Oh God."

Then I scream. I must be in a nightmare. This must be a fucking nightmare.

I can feel my chest heave rapidly and I slam my shoulder into the side of the box, once and then twice but I'm not going anywhere. I can't fucking breathe. I'm hyperventilating.

I've been buried alive. Buried. Alive. I never thought I had serious fears until this moment.

Nate. I cry out through the mindlink desperately. Nate. I-I need you. I don't know where the fuck I am.

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