The telephone booth

Chapter Thirty-Nine Amy Moyes

Chapter Thirty-Nine
Amy Moyes
 
    A very strange thing had happened. The two happy and cheerful people had left their children to their great uncle to go on a trip by themselves and have fun. Their trip did not last long because they had to face their fate soon and accept that they could not see William and Mary anymore and there was no news of their games and smiles. This incident was very hard, heavy and unbelievable for Amy.
A big black cloud had cast a shadow over the city of happiness in a fraction of a second and still after all these years the black and ugly shadow of this terrifying cloud was over their lives, especially for Amy.
It was a very strange thing. When they returned from that cursed trip, they found out that Will and Mary had drowned in the small and relatively deep lake of their uncle's house while holding hands and the old servant had fallen into a deep sleep and of course the uncle of the children had to leave the house for an important work in the company and go to work.
Anyway, years passed from this horrible incident. Amy Moyes felt a terrible guilt in every moment. She felt that she was an irresponsible mother. She was not a mother at all. Her whole world was summed up in the smile of her children. What did that damned trip mean? Having fun away from any kind of mischief and sweet troubles of the children, she should have enjoyed the trip? Now she hated the trip. She was afraid that something worse than before would happen during the trip. She did not enjoy the trip at all anymore. During these years, she thought about this matter. If she did not go on this trip, she would do her best to keep her playful and running children away from her eyes for even a moment. Was drowning in water and suffocation as a result of it a quick and painless death? Amy did not think so, because of this, she always had a deep and heavy sorrow in her chest and burned from within. During all this time, the earth still spun with ruthless stubbornness but Amy Moyes's train of life had stopped moving. Amy had pulled the brake herself.
   Mr. Moyes looked at Amy's eyes in surprise that were staring at Scott. Amy realized after a long time that Scott's appearance had changed too. He had aged a little and despite the fact that he did not like his beard, he had grown one. With this beard, mustache and short hair, his face looked more like Paul Walker. Anyway, Scott said anxiously: "Amy listen." But Amy interrupted him and said: "Listen, I'm fine. I'm really fine. Don't look at me with so much worry, I don't deny Will's death anymore." Now she was looking into her husband's eyes. She realized that Scott had gone silent as if he was shocked, so she said: "Are you surprised by my talk? I know I haven't talked to you even a word in these years. I tortured myself and you too. I'm really sorry. With the departure of the children, my life became dark, I hate darkness. It may seem like a big lie but I love you but I ruined both our lives with this constant silence."
  "Amy!"
  "What? I'm apologizing."
  "But you don't need to apologize."
  "Why don't I need to? It's amazing that you lived with a moving dead for so long and talked a lot! You were a quiet person and because of me, you did this to yourself, you smiled, you took care of me."
  "I got a bad feeling from your talk; do you really think it's so strange that I did these things?! I don't think so because I loved you too."
   "I saw Christian a few days ago."
   "Really? Are you telling the truth?"
  Amy Moyes looked directly into Scott Moyes's eyes; but Mr. Moyes stole his gaze from her and stared at his hands.
  Amy Moyes said: "Why are you so surprised? I know that you and Christian have been seeing each other for a few days."
***
Mr. Moyes was really confused. He rubbed his palms together, but the air was not cold at all. He did it out of anxiety. He wanted to say something, but he bit his lip and said nothing. Was it too late to go back?

***
Amy Moyes said, "I thought you loved me? I thought I mattered to you." Scott interrupted her and said, "But you are making a mistake." Before Mr. Moyes could finish his sentence, Amy raised her hand and calmly said, "Wait, I'm talkin