These secrets will kill us Oliver Sykes

Chapter 24 ~ Do I sink or swim?

Veronica's POV

3 weeks later.

I don't know how long I've been lying here, could be days, could be weeks, could be months. I didn't really care. Nothing mattered anymore, I wasn't really here, I just 'existed'. It felt like my whole world had collapsed or had a power cut, probably both. It felt like I couldn't see, everything was just black.

I opened my eyes again and it was dark outside not that it made much difference in my opinion, I could hear the rain thrash against the hotel windows, I hope we weren't having a storm...I hated them. Vic always used to hold me. Wait. He's left. I felt numb but that might be because I've been in the same position for a long time. I picked up my iPod that was charging on the side and put my earphones in, I played the same song that I've been listening to since I got here; the sky under the sea. I guess you could say it was my lullaby, his voice just made me feel safe, like he was really here, lying next to me singing like he used to.

I woke up and felt cold, I stretched out my arm over to the other side of the bed, but I didn't feel anything, just the cold empty mattress. I felt my heart sink once more when I realised that I was on my own and the memories flooded back. I saw my phone go off again, I quickly peeked to see who it was '138 new messages' '87 missed calls' I sighed and rolled over putting my earphones back in, I stared out of the long window waiting for Vic to send me back to sleep once again.

I felt someone shake me lightly before taking my headphones out "Veronica?" wake up" they shook me again. I groaned and opened my eyes to see Mike kneeling by the bed with Tony and Jaime not far behind. I groaned again, they interrupted my dream about Vic, I saw his perfect face once again and it felt real, like he was there with me, it made me feel okay again until I realised it was just a dream. "What do you want Mike?" I mumbled closing my eyes again hoping he'd go away.

"Jesus V, how long have you been like this?" he asked. I sighed

"Not long enough" I whispered "all the days and the nights roll into one"

"You've been here for three weeks, Vic's funeral was three weeks ago" Tony breathed. I tensed up at his words 'Vic's funeral' he wasn't really gone, he'd be back soon.

"No, I'm waiting for Vic to come back, will you tell him I'm here if he goes back to the venue by accident?" I asked. "V, he's gone, Vic's gone" he mumbled as he walked over to me. I felt a tear roll down my cheek and I rolled over. I wasn't in the mood to talk, I don't think I ever would be again.

Mikes POV

"How's she doing?" Kellin asked as we walked over to him and Oliver. I sighed and ran my hand through my hair thinking of the way she looked, her skin was paler than usual, she was definitely thinner and her hair was weak. "Terrible, she refuses to accept that he's gone, she's waiting for him to come to the hotel and take her back home" Jaime answered.

"Did you tell her he wasn't?" Kellin said

"Yeah, she just turned out and cried like she usually does. Seriously, I'm worried, everytime I go round she's in the same position. I don't think she's been eating but obviously she's been drinking as she's still alive. All she does is look out the window and sleeps, she has bags under her eyes so I don't understand" I replied

"Why don't you just bring her back here?" Oli questioned

"She's got nowhere, her bus is where they were shot and ours is where all of his stuff is" Tony pitched in

"She can stay with us." I raised my eyebrow

"Really?" I asked, Oliver nodded 

"Great, well if you can get her out of there then fine but good luck mate, she won't want anything to do with you" Tony added

Oliver's POV

I sat on the chair and watched her sleep, she was clutching onto a jumper which I assumed was Vic's. She looked peaceful, like it was where she wanted to be. I doubt she even wanted me here really, I mean we haven't technically spoke since the wedding and that didn't go down very well. "What do you want Oliver?" she said, making me jump, jesus christ. She pulled out an earphone and didn't bother to open her eyes. "To check if you're okay of course" I replied

"Bullshit Oliver you don't care about me, you've made that quite clear over the years so what do you really want?"

I swallowed hard, she was completely wrong. I watched her open her eyes and glare at me, Mike was right she did look terrible, she had dark black bags underneath but her light blue eyes had lost their spark, she just looked...dead.

"You need to stop torturing yourself" I simply said, she raised an eyebrow like she didn't have a clue what I was going on about.

"Listening to Vic sing, it's not helping you at all love" I added

"You wouldn't know the first thing about helping me Oliver because I'm not you and that's the only person you actually care about"

"I loved you" I blurted out before I could stop the words leaving my mouth

"No Oliver, it's some teenage crush, Vic loved me-" I cut her off

"V, shut up about Vic, it's not healthy, he's gone. he's not coming back why can't you see that? Have you seen yourself? You can't go on like this waiting  for him to come back because he won't, you'll meet him one day but that's all. You need to leave these four walls and learn how to live again" I ranted. I quickly shut up and watched her facial expression but it didn't change, her face was just emotionless. The same way it had been when I got here.

"The doors that way" was the reply.

"Fine, I'm going but just so you know you're leaving here later and coming back to the venue. You're staying on our bus until we finish warped" I got up and opened the door when I heard sniffles coming from the bed. I closed the door making her think I'd left and she burst into tears, I watched her and realised how much it hurt me to see her fall apart like this.

I walked over to her and climbed into the bed pulling her into me, at first she pushed and pulled maybe screamed at me to go away but I just made my grip tighter until she gave up and just melted into my arms and cried.

Veronica's POV

Oliver wouldn't stop holding me, I tried fighting it but his grip got tighter so I just let it happen. I felt my eyes grow heavy and I started to fall asleep.

"What's going on in that head of yours V" he whispered while stroking my hair "what's going on."

A/N Sorry if I took ages to update, I was back at school today so that means I'll probably only be able to update on weekends:( but I'll try to in the week.

I'm also SO EXCITED BECAUSE SLEEPING WITH SIRENS ARE TOURING IN ENGLAND SO I'M GOING AND BRING ME THE HORIZON ARE TOURING HERE TOO AND I'M GOING AND I JUST CAN'T WAIT I'VE WAITED TOO LONG FOR THIS. 

sorry, okay I love you, thanks for readingggggg!<3