64: History

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Y/N's POV:

You can do this.

"I can do this."

He loves you.

"He loves me."

He could never hate you.

"He's gonna hate me."

I bury my face in my hands, feeling completely helpless. If I hadn't slipped up and said that, I wouldn't have to go through the pain of thinking of an explanation. I could forget it. But I freaked him out.

"Dang it." I mutter, hitting a pillow beside me. My motivational pep talk with myself hadn't helped at all. I hear the door to the apartment open and the bundle of nerves in my stomach jerks, making me want to puke.

"Hey, Y/N! I'm home, kitten!" Shawn's perfect voice rings through the third floor apartment, and I shove myself off the bed to come meet him.

"Hey babe." I put on a fake smile and reach up to kiss him on the cheek.

"So, how was your day?" He asks, throwing his keys onto the counter.

"Eh, it's been a day. How was yours?" I reply, stalling as much as a can.

"It was actually really good! Outside the station I got to meet a ton of fans, and you know my day gets ten times better when that happens." He grins, pulling me to him. I wrap my arms around his built torso and take a deep breath.

"Look, Shawn. I wanted to explain what happened earlier." I shy away from him as I start to say it.

"What? With the picture? Y/N, you don't have to explain yourself." He sits down at one of the bar stools and pulls one out for me.

"I do. That was totally creepy and I want to apologize. Shawn, for the longest time before we were dating I was a huge fan. I basically, um, wow, there's not a non-creepy way to say this-"

"Stalked me?"

"Yeah. Anyways, I pretended for the longest time that I had no clue who you were and that I had only heard Stitches. The whole time I was dying to tell you that I love you and all of your music. I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want you to hate me." I explain, running on one breath.

"Y/N." He says quietly, pausing.

Great job. You just messed up your whole relationship with him. Fantastic.

"Y/N, look. I've said before I wouldn't mind dating a fan. It was a nice escape when I thought you weren't a fan and didn't know everything about me."

See? Dang it. If I'd only kept my mouth shut.

"But that doesn't mean I love you any less."

"What? I thought my past was going to creep you out?" I look up from my shorts, and pull my lower lip in between my teeth anxiously.

"No, absolutely not. I'm dating you because you are you, and I'm not going to let some thing like that destroy our relationship. Plus, I really like the fact that you've probably already seen all of my embarrassing pictures. Like this one." He smirks, flashing me his phone.

"Oh my gosh, yeah I haven't seen that one." I giggle. Four year old Shawn was sitting in his living room with chocolate cake smashed all over his face and pink icing in his hair and eyes.

"Oh. Well I smashed Aaliyah's baby cake." He says, blushing like crazy.

"You jerk!" I giggle. He slams his phone down, picks me up, and carries me into the living room where he lays me down on the couch and curls up next to me.

"I promise, I'll never let your history get in the way of who you really are to me." He whispers.

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A/N

Aye guys! Wow. This one is actually way longer than some of the other ones I have up right now. Anyways, I love you babes!

QOTD: How long have you been part of the Mendes Army?

AOTD: About two years. We're not here to judge you for how long you have been a fan. I love you guys and you are all beautiful people.

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