Almost - m.c

Chapter 32

"She won't stay for you if she doesn't know you want her to."

Michael's P.O.V

"Have you really not spoken to Kelsey in a week?" Ashton asked me as I was spending some time at his place.

"Right. I haven't spoken to her in a week."

"Why?"

"Because I'm mad at her."

"Are you mad at her because she didn't tell you what day she was leaving before she told us or are you mad at her because of the fact that she is leaving?"

"What?"

"Are you mad at her for not telling you sooner or are you upset because the reality is that she's leaving."

"Well I wish she would have told me before I was blind-sided in front of you guys."

"Luke & Calum didn't notice your reaction as anything out of the ordinary. They don't know how deep your feelings are."

"Still. I wish we had that conversation in private first."

"Well you didn't so get over it. Can you imagine how hard it must have been for her to have to share that?"

"Then she shouldn't go home."

"Michael, she isn't a citizen here. She's a student. Once she's no longer a student, the government has rules about how long you can stay after that, especially if you're not employed. I bet she'd explain that to you if you'd let her."

"I can't get over that she's leaving though. You can't expect me to just pretend this is all okay & that I'm happy she's going home."

"Do you wish you were her reason to stay?"

"Well, yea. I do. I want her to have the same realization I had & then stay for me."

"She won't stay for you if she doesn't know you want her to."

"But what if there aren't any feelings there? Then I make myself look like an idiot & she still flies home. I'm not telling her. She leaves in two months. I can't tell her. Either way, I'm losing her."

"You could be her reason to stay."

"But I'm not. If I were her reason to stay, she never would have booked a flight home in the first place."

"I'm sorry, Mikey. I really am."

"It's not your fault. You warned me this would happen."

"Still, I am sorry."

Even after speaking with Ashton, I was still mad.

I wasn't quite sure if I was mad at Kelsey or if I was mad just at the situation but I was mad.

I didn't want Kelsey to go because I'd miss her so much yet I didn't want to see either because it hurt to physically see her now that I know she has a flight home.

It was painful to see her because I knew our time was limited. It hurt to see her because I wanted to kiss her, not for sex, but because I liked her. It hurt to see her because I couldn't be honest with her. I had to hide about how I felt. I had to keep our banter super sexual when I really just wanted to call her beautiful.

& call her mine.

-

Throughout the following week, Kelsey continued to text me. I had about ten messages from her since she I began ignoring her. I didn't reply to any.

Kelsey-

are you still mad at me?

Kelsey-