wrapped｡ yoonseok

40

"First of all, I would like to thank you all for coming to attend my little sister's funeral. Min Somi was born on June 8th, 2013, in Daegu, South Korea, into an ordinary family. She was the most beautiful little girl I have ever seen. I was so happy to know that I finally have a baby sister. She was the family's little princess. One can never say no to her. She was a living bubble of happiness, bringing us all laughter, lightheartedness, and fun. She was just a ball of sunshine.

But it was all taken away from her when my mother passed. A little bit after Somi was born. My dad wasn't that big of a help, either. But I'm not here to talk about my parents. I'm here because of my little sister. Even though my dad wasn't the ideal father figure a little girl needed, she coped well.

She was just like any other kid. She loved ice cream more than vegetables. She didn't want to sleep early. She loved sweets more than her life. Donuts, especially. She always talked to me about how she wanted to be a vet when she grew up. She loved pets. She had a dog and she never took her eyes off of her. Gaby, our dog, was like her best friend.

There was this one time where Gaby pulled Somi with her into the mud. That one time she smiled so much because he got her her favorite food. That was a very great day for us. It was a happy day. I can keep talking about my sister's stories for days and nights. During the past several days, everyone in the family, no matter what they were doing or where they were, could not help but see Somi's smiles and replaying her life stories in our minds.

She's gone; how can our living move on? She is gone, but our memories of her are very much alive.

Somi, you're simply the best.

Thank you." Yoongi finished and wiped away a tear.

**

"Thank you so much for coming." Yoongi said to the last person as they left the church. He gulped and turned to me. Everybody was already gone but my family, Jimin and Jungkook were waiting outside to go to the burial.

I knew that he couldn't really say anything so I just pulled him in for a hug and stayed like that for a couple of seconds. After that, I pulled away.

"Come on, let's go." He mumbled. I nodded and we walked out.

We all got in separate cars but headed to the same destination. We got out and followed the carrying of the coffin. We stopped in front of the place they will put the coffin in and waited. I had flowers with me, just like everyone else. They all had red eyes. They all cried. When they lowered the coffin into the ground, it was like slow motion. It was very sad. I've spent such little time with Somi yet this hurts so much. She didn't deserve this. I told myself I wouldn't let her get hurt. I broke my promise and now she's gone. It's all because of me. The guilt that's in me is too much. I feel like it's all my fault she's gone. It's eating me alive.

After they lowered the coffin, they began covering it with the sand that was dug out. I looked at her grave as it was done. Tears rolled down my cheeks and I gripped the flowers harshly. They all left flowers on top of her grave. It was my turn now. My head hurt and I tried so hard to keep my sobs in. But I couldn't. I let out a sob as I walked towards it and laid down some dandelions on her grave.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you, Somi." I whispered. I stood up and walked back to the rest. Yoongi pulled me in for a hug and I sobbed. I couldn't keep it in.

**

My parents left first, then Jimin and Jungkook did. I stayed longer with Yoongi.

"I heard you." He said.

"Heard what?"

"What you said when you put down the flowers. It wasn't your job to protect her. It was mine. Don't blame yourself for what happened."

"I can't help but think it's my fault, Yoongi, I told her we'd leave unharmed but I failed. I gave her hope that we'll be able to leave but we didn't. I said I would protect her and that I wouldn't let her get hurt but look at what happened." I broke down. "It's my fault she's gone, Yoongi, and all this is eating me alive. I can't help it. I wish the bullet would've hit me instead of her. I've lived way more than she did and she can't die now. She's too young. Why did she have to go? It's all my fault."

He just stared at me. "It's not your fault, okay? You didn't see what happened. You fainted, remember? Somi moved and my dad shot her. I already told you he was sick. He intentionally shot her. Just like that. I don't know what was going through his mind during that time. I didn't know what to do at that moment. You were lying on the floor, looking lifeless as well as my sister.

It hurt so bad to see that. I thought he shot you too. I was supposed to be the one to protect her. Both her and you. I made the mistake of letting you come with me. If you didn't come, you wouldn't blame yourself. I can't change what happened but I know for sure it wasn't your fault. You weren't the one holding the gun, were you? No, you weren't. It was my sad excuse of a dad. Yes, she's gone. Yes, I miss her. Yes, it hurts but I can't change it. It happened already. Stop blaming yourself because I don't want to see you hurt like that." He held my shoulders and shook me slightly.

"Get the thought of it being your fault out of your head, princess. And don't ever, ever wish for the bullet to hit you. Yeah, it hit my sister and I don't know how I'm gonna be able to live without her but it would've been the same with you. I would still not know how to live without you. It would hurt me just as much as it hurts now. So please, don't ever say that ever again." He frowned. His eyes were red and watery.

I was pretty much crying at this point. He caressed my cheek and leaned forward, planting a light, tender kiss on my lips.

"Don't cry, baby. It doesn't suit you." He called me baby. "Show me your beautiful smile."

__
im awwing at myself is this normAL