Regrets are Always at the End

Kabanata 1

Dedicated to: reasthetic

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     "You are marrying Sean, Gizelle. And that's final!" Mom said and walked out of my room, slamming my door.

   What the hell is wrong with her? Ba't ba niya pinagpipilitan na pakasalan ko si Sean? Eh hindi ko naman siya boyfriend. At hindi ko rin siya type. I mean, I'll admit he's the hottest guy in the village but, nuh uh. Binully niya ako ever since pumasok kami sa day care. There wasn't a day na hindi niya ako binully. As soon as he catches a glimpse of me, may pakulo ng naiisip agad yun.

   A sigh escaped from my mouth. When will I have my freedom that I've been hungry for? Sabi ni mama di na niya papakialaman buhay ko once I reach the age of 18. And guess how old I am now? I am freaking 22 years old and nangingialam pa rin siya. A soft knock was heard and the door to my room opened.

     Lumabas yung ulo ni ate and she asked, "Want to talk about it?"

     I nodded as I sighed. "Yes, ate. I really need someone to talk to."

   She went in my room and sat at the edge of my bed and caressed my hair. I relaxed a little bit and sat up when I was ready to share. My sister and I has always been like this. Kahit siya yung pinaka-matanda samin ni kuya, mas close kami kesa kay kuya. Sabi kasi nila na mas magiging close mo yung nauna or nasunod mong kapatid. But I guess that rule exempts my sister and I.

     "Si mama kasi. Pinipilit na naman ako," I started. "I mean, I don't like Sean, ate. And I never will, ever. He sucks in everything. And mama is forcing me to marry that douche bag."

     "Pasensyahan mo na si mama. Alam mo naman na strict yun about having good relationships with the Montemayor," ate defended.

     "Ikaw ate ha. You're defending mama," sabi ko. "Akala ko ba sa'kin ka kampi?"

     "I'm not defending anyone, Gizelle. I just want you two to be okay,"

     I let out a deep sigh and pinatong ko ulo ko sa tiyan ni ate and said, "I understand mama and her obsession with good reputation. Pero, ba't niya ako dapat pilitin? I'm a grown woman, for pete's sake. 22 na ako. I have my own life."

     "Alam mo bunso, intindihin mo na lang si mama,"

     "I've been understanding her for 22 years, ate. I think it's time she understands me," I said.

   Hindi na sumagot si ate and just continued to caress my hair. Bahala si mama. Basta hinding hindi ko papakasalan yung demonyong yun.

~

   Nagising ako 2 days after ng usapan namin ni mama nung may kumatok sa kwarto ko. Dahan dahan kong minulat mata ko and I felt grumpy nung nakita ko yung orasan.  Sino ba kasi ang di iinit ang ulo kung gigisingin ka at 4:35 in the morning?! Nagpatuloy yung pagkatok and it made me grumpier.

     "Pasok!!!"

     "Bakit ka ba sumisigaw, Gizelle? Ang aga aga," sabi ng boses.

   Kilala ko tong boses na to. And its none other than my brother, Myrick.

     "Sino kaya ang di iinit an gulo kung gigising ka ng 4 ng umaga, ha?!" sigaw ko.

     "Oo na sorry na," sabi ni kuya.

     "Bakit ka ba kasi nandito ha, kuya?" tanong ko. "Wala akong pasok ngayon eh and I was having my beauty sleep."

     "Eh kasi may sasabihin ako,"