The Resistance

Chapter 36

{Kaelynn}

Looking in the mirror made me feel even more discouraged than I already felt. Stepping on the scale earlier made me shed tears. I've been stuck around the same weight.

These past three weeks have been very different for me. Thanks to Jahmir, I got a job at his cousin's salon. Yani is a very nice person, and she was so glad to welcome me to her team. Especially when she seen a few hairstyles I've done. I mostly only know how to do braids. She is teaching me how to do sew ins and crochet.

I was thinking she only did her thing at the salon, but it turns out she is pretty popular on Instagram. Some people book her and her team for photo and video shoots. She has a booking coming up next month and she wants me to come along too.

Working is good because being broke is a struggle. I'm grateful to have a job, but it keeps me so busy. Between work and school, I barely have any time to focus on myself. Jahmir works with me on the weekend, but other than that, I don't get to exercise. I've only dropped five pounds these past few weeks. That isn't much at all.

Because I was, and still am, feeling discouraged, I came up with the idea to buy some diet pills. Nothing too crazy. I chose to get Garcinia Cambogia. I did my research to look for the best one. So far I don't really see any results. I'm not going to tell Jahmir about it. I'm just going to take them and see if they work.

My phone vibrated, so I pulled it out my pocket.

🙈JayPooh🙈:

Nothing worth having will come easy. Sometimes it takes a thousand tries to win.

Me:

Umm, did you just quote Rihanna?

🙈JayPooh🙈:

................................................. umm, maybe.

Me:

Wow.

🙈JayPooh🙈:

Where's the lie boo boo?! Lmao, nah but foreal. It's true. You have to try and try and try in order to succeed in life. Of course you have to change things each time you try. Insanity is when you do the same thing over and over expecting different results. You may fail once. You may fail twice. You may fail four times. You might realize that I skipped the third time. But the most important part is that you actually try. And I have to say that I am very proud of you. You've been making moves to become a better person. I'm so happy and appreciative to be able to call you my friend.

Jahmir always knows what to say to boost my confidence. I'm glad he notices that I've been trying. It gets hard. Especially my mindset. It isn't easy at all to knock negative thoughts or negative vibes. But he is my inspiration. He is my motivation. He is my best friend. And I have to say, I'm beginning to feel differently about him. His genuine friendship has me wanting something more. Something such as being his girlfriend. It feels so weird saying that I'm developing feelings for him. We have been friends for all these years.

Me:

Thank you so much Jaykinz. See you at school. 😊

I put my phone in my pocket then I sat back on my bed. Although I feel how I feel, there's something within me that feels like Jahmir and I would never end up together.

"How can he know how I feel if I never say anything? What's the worst that could happen? Our friendship is a forever thing regardless of anything that may happen." I looked across the room to my mirror. "Start taking chances, Kaelynn."