fix you || A.I.

chapter fifty-one

——— Ashton's POV ———

I always wondered how people suddenly know they love someone. How they know when the time is right to say those three simple words who have such a strong meaning together.

I have always wondered if it is even possible to feel that way for someone. Or if love is just an overrated thing. That we just say those words when we think we know who we want to be with.

But right here and now, I know better. Those words only mean something when it's said at the right time. You can't rush loving someone. Up untill two hours ago, I had no clue I felt this way. But right now I want to be the one that loves her for the rest of her live. I want to be the one she will love.

But how the hell do people find the courage to say those three simple words after eachother when the one they want to hear it is wide awake. I can't do that. Somehow I feel more vulnerable to tell her I love her, then when she saw my body. When she heard my story and saw my skin paintings.

If I am this scared to tell her, am I really inlove with her? Because what if I'm not? What if I just like the imagine of loving her?

I want to love her. I want to make her happy.

—-

"Goodmorning" Alexis said when she walked inside the kitchen. I was standing next to the coffee machine so I took a cup and filled one for her aswell. She looked exhausted.

"How did you sleep?" I asked, I was nervous. I'm usually not nervous around her anymore but today I feel like a nervous teenager who is about to have his first kiss. Because kissing her is all I want to do right now.

"Like an angel" she said sarcastically. She was clearly not in a good mood. "Did you know you snore even louder in your own bed then on tour?"

"I might have known that." I said with a grin as she made her final step towards me to get her cup of coffee "here you go"

"Thank you, I'll need it." She took anther step towards the counter before putting the cup down and jumping up to sit on the counter beside me. "What time is it?"

"It's only 10, we still have two hours before we have to leave." I said with a smile before filling my cup again. Mornings with her were funny. One of us is always moody and when we're both, it's a glaring competition in complete silence.

"Great" she grunted before looking at me. "Did you get food?"

"I got everything I need to make you pancakes." I replied with a proud smile. I put my alarm early enough so I could go to the store and give her another snoreless hour or even two.

"Then why aren't you making them yet?" She said with an adorable grin. The coffee was starting to kick in and finally waking her up.

"I didn't expect you to come out of bed before 11"

"If I knew there would be pancakes, I would have been awake a lot earlier." She said with a smile before pushing me away from the counter. She ofcourse didn't move, she was going to watch me every move.

I laughed a little before opening the fridge to take everything I needed. I'm not the best cook, but I know the basic things to make her happy. Like pancakes and pasta.