Terrible Fates (BEN Drowned story)

Chapter 46

[No more winter break. It'll be back to the fray soon. Dammit.

Anyway, enjoy the update!]

Stay Creepy, My Friends!~

Chapter 46

Reese's POV

The worst weekend I experienced in a long time was after Hunter's accident. Mom asked for leave off work due to family emergency. Artem has been staying at the apartment to keep me company, especially without Mom there. He let me take Friday off because of what happened, and has been doing well to not mention work or school to me. In fact, the ruski doesn't really talk to me because he knows I won't say much—will refuse to say anything. He just makes sure I eat and get proper rest like he was asked to do by my mom. I've never seen him so caring before, or as caring as a man like Artem Kuznetsov can be. He's significantly more mindful of what I say or do compared to just brushing me off like he usually does. He hasn't even called me soplyak and has simply said my name out of respect.

Since Hunter's accident, I haven't wanted to leave the apartment. This resulted in me not meeting Ben, or really talking to him. The only time we talked was on a phone call in which I told him that I couldn't go to prom.

He understood and I was relieved. He sent his best wishes to Hunter, to me, to my mom. That was it. But relief was overshadowed by the disappointment I felt at myself. All I've felt since the accident was never-ending disappointment, from when I wake up to when I fall asleep under my fake, plastic stars. Disappointment in myself for having not been good enough to help Hunter, for being unable to be with Ben and share a great night together, for being a depressing bum always laying in bed while Mom goes from work to the hospital and Artem waits patiently in our home. Most of all, I'm disappointed in myself not for what I failed to do but for what I did.

What did I do? I pleaded with any sort of God of higher power to make me suffer instead. I wished for my own death in place of what could have awaited Hunter. I wanted to disappear from this life if it meant everyone would be better off that way. That sort of thinking, those feelings that I felt for the past weekend; these things are things that Hunter hates. He hated when I said I shouldn't exist and I'm sure he would hate it now. Plus, I know that those thoughts make his actions seem so worthless, when that's not what I think of them at all. I'm disappointed in myself for letting my mind, my spirit, my faith hit the very bottom of all human self-hatred.

Hunter was unconscious for two days after his accident, and on the third day, Sunday, he finally woke up. Once I heard the news from Mom, I begged Artem to take me to the hospital to see him. He was hesitant at first, but after pleading and pushing at him, he finally gave in and agreed to take me to the hospital (his main concern was that I hadn't showered all weekend and needed to, very badly, before we left for anywhere). I finally smiled for the first time and my body had energy once again.

Upon arriving at the hospital, I couldn't help but remember the last time I was here, when I was attacked by a Corrupted. That seems like so long ago now. I've completely forgotten that the scars on my face were so recent because of that abomination. I wonder, how did Hunter feel when he heard I was in the hospital? Did he feel horrible, saddened, anxious, hopeful? That big ol' teddy bear he gave me... The smile on his face when he finally came to visit me... God...

Artem signed me in (it's a good thing Mom wrote him down as an associated friend) and the receptionist said Hunter was on the fifth floor. Unfortunately, the ruski said he couldn't come with me as there was an important call he had to take with my mom. "Tell him I send my regards," he said to me. I felt a bit uncomfortable trekking the hospital on my own but it couldn't be helped. My heart was pounding in my chest when I stood in the elevator, as I watched the digital numbers above the door count up to 5. My fingers began to fiddle with the visitor's card clipped to the hem of my shirt.