Good Enough |✅|

Jeremiah

   My head felt lighter.

   How does she do that?

   The first moment, my mind was raging. The second moment, it was grieving and then it was hysterically excited.

Jeremiah : Voice. 

Susan :  . . . . Hm?

Jeremiah : Voice. It was your voice. Your voice is what caught my attention. Your voice is what made me lift my head and . . . . stare into your eyes.

   That's right. It was the summer performance. The first time I had eye contact with Susan was when I'd felt a real connection.
   And now suddenly, with Susan holding my face, my hands on hers and the distance between our eyes just a few centimetres, I felt it again. A connection. A bridge. That could possibly transform the dark corner in my chest which had gone completely rotten by then.

   What had she told me?
   To get a grip over myself?
   Apparently that dark corner in my heart was making it difficult. But now that she'd said all that, I doubted how long it'd take me to wash all the darkness out of me.

   My head really felt light. 
   In fact, a little too light. 

   And then suddenly the sides of my eyes were closing. Susan's voice was fading out. Her face's outline was thinning. . . .
   Susan . . . . Susan . . . .

   The next time I opened my eyes, I was in my bed. The curtains were drawn apart and the afternoon sunlight was drowning my whole room in it. I stared out the window for a few seconds . . . . . before realising. . . . .

   Susan!

   I turned around. Nope, my room was empty.
   I jumped out of bed and was immediately attacked with a striking pain in my head. I sank to my knees, clutching my head.

   At that moment, the door opened.

Susan : Ah! Why did you get out of bed?

   She picked me up with great difficulty and dropped me back on my bed. My head was yet throbbing.

Susan : You haven't slept for a long time, have you?

   Now that I thought about it . . . . she was right. I hadn't slept at all since . . . . . the return from the hospital.

Jeremiah : You brought me here?

Susan : Yeah, well. . . . You're really heavy though. Are all boys this heavy?

   I sighed and a smile unknowingly crept onto my face.
   Susan's eyes widened slightly and she turned her face away. Her cheeks coloured faintly.

   Was she actually blushing?!

   I had no idea nerds had that trait in them.
   Or maybe it was just Susan who I thought probably didn't have that trait in her.
   Her emotionless blank face that had affected me so much was blushing.
  Wow.

Jeremiah : Uh . . . So, uh, what about the others?

Susan : Ah, they left too. I think. . . . But it's cool. I texted them.

Jeremiah : Ah okay . . .

   Why had it suddenly become so awkward to actually say anything?

Susan : Listen . . . . About what I said. . . I know, I know. It all sounded so sappy that I can't even. I don't know what was going on and I couldn't really control my tongue so I said too much.

Jeremiah : Which included a lot of cussing.

Susan : You cuss all the time though.

Jeremiah : I'm an exception.

Susan : Yeah, not really. . . . .

   Okay, maybe not that awkward . . .

Susan : But the point is that . . . . your unhappiness is affecting people around you too.
   I raised an eyebrow.

Jeremiah : Oh yeah? And that includes?

Susan : Me! . . . And Daniel! And Raul and Pam and Tara and Kaedan . . . I think . . . . But mostly me!

   Okay, did not expect that. Her expression was way too cute. Morelike, she actually had an expression on.

Jeremiah : I'm sorry. 

Susan : No seriously. You can't actually be blamed so there's no need for apologies. Although I don't know about Daniel. 

Jeremiah : . . . . I think he'll be fine. At least I hope. He's got Raul.

   Susan stared at me.

Jeremiah : What?

Susan : You actually think about others?

   I was taken aback by her skepticism.

Jeremiah : You're kidding me, right? Of course I do! I think. At least the people I care about. 

Susan : Ah Jeremiah . . . You're weird on so many levels. 

Jeremiah : Where's this coming from?

Susan : I'm praising you. In nerd language, it means you're cool and totally datable.

   That got me laughing.

Jeremiah : . . . . Nerd language? That sounds lame. And moreover— datable . . . . . . ?

   I didn't even know why Susan continued staring at me but her stare made my feelings churn. Some part or corkscrew of my brain was twisting and changing decisions on its own.

   And then suddenly she started humming. Like literally. It was a song. But I couldn't really figure out what it was. I only noticed how beautiful she looked at that particular point in time. I only noticed how inexplicably peaceful my mind became. I only realised how much it reminded me of my favourite season—spring. Not too extravagant, nor too drab. Just light and moderate.

   I also noticed how hard my heart was beating. 
   Even though Susan's eyes were closed, I wondered if I had any of my brimming emotions cascaded across my face.
   Susan stopped. She looked into my eyes. I was afraid she would see right through me.
   It then happened again. She smiled. She smiled a pretty, genuine smile. I noticed every inch and corner of her features. It was like the world was moving in slow motion. 

Susan : It was my voice, wasn't it?

   I relaxed. I nodded. 

Susan : Well then. I hope I can make a change using it. I mean, a change for the good. Although if you ask me personally, I'd prefer you staying exactly as you are minus the super extra grumpy part.

   The revelation was followed by two seconds of silence. And then we broke down into peals of laughter.

   Just hours ago, I couldn't even cast a decent regarding look toward someone but now I was actually laughing. I could actually relax my shoulders.

   And as I continued laughing and looking at Susan, I realised something even more important.

   I was in love.

   With the girl sitting right in front of me.

   And I was hopelessly, troublesomely helpless about it.
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Hello!
Double confession!
Who doesn't like a good hardcore confession? (Even though it's in the head)
Vote and comment if you liked that and also share this story!
Thank you!
- Mallina