Meathead Monologue

it felt something like a star tumbling from my mouth

i couldn't wait for fifth period to end. for those five minutes of chaos in the halls, when we would finally see each other.
walking down a-hall, i saw you with your head raised, searching for someone. could it be me? or was it always her?
i locked eyes with you, for several seconds, and through your glasses i stared. sometimes you would even stare back, like we had a secret to keep. like we had done something wrong and no one could know.
yet as we crossed paths, my head always fell a little lower than before.
i had not realized when it was that i began to hold my breath around you.
but every time you became out of sight, and i was sure you could not see me, a surge of happy blew through my body like a strong summer breeze, warm and cool at the same time. every inch of me felt tingly and i knew this feeling in the back of my head, even though it felt so new to me.
my heart was tight and my legs moved like i was being chased, but there was no one.
you were already gone to your next class.
and all my breath that i had been holding in came out in one strained sigh.
and then five minutes was up.

r.k.