Haunted By My Future

Chapter 25: The Truth.

This is a dream.

This only could be a dream.

Let this be a dream,

Please....

It hurts. The reality hurts. So many weeks passed by and I gave my best to not think about them, at least not a lot. I don't wanted to bring my past back, I wanted to move on... Deep inside, I was hurt, but I always lied to myself... Always telling myself that I was okay. But I was not. I was really afraid. Afraid of them. Yet, he brought me back here. And I didn't knew anything about it. It feels like he stabbed me straight into my heart.  My already broken heart. 

I runned away, I runned away from home because I couldn't face them with something that I wanted. They were capacitable of ruling my whole life. They controlled me and I couldn't do anything against it. I dread the both of them, I can't even face my own parents again.

And he found out about them.
The man I somehow missed the whole week.
The first person in this world I really wanted to come back.
The same person who acted like he has to do his paperwork on his bedroom desk, while in reality, his paperwork were in his office. It was not once, but twice. The first day I woke up at Dereck's house and today.

This man is icier than anything in this world could ever be. A man, who's not showing much expressions at all and is doing things behind everyones back. And he did the same to me too...

I looked at him, he looked forward. He tapped with his index finger onto the wheel while holding it. I wanted him to look at me. I wanted him to tell me what was going on. Why we were here,
How it comes that he knows, that I lived here. I feel betrayed. Like garbage that you usually throw away without thinking about it. He's using my own weapons to fight against me.

"H-How?" I whispered with a trembling voice. Only a whisper... I couldn't speak. It felt like something extremely heavy was squeezing me onto the ground. The funny fact is, that it's not something that a human being can ever see. It's everything, every feeling, memory and more important, My already broken heart... No one can see it, nor feel it. Again, It's just me alone. No one else. What do they say? 'There's only one person-space in your grave. You're born alone and die alone.'

Dwayne cleared his throat and looked into my direction. He looked at me, and then back out.
It was silent for a minute, until Dwayne stepped out of the car. My heartbeat harmonized with his footsteps and I watched him coming slowly over to my side, while checking out with his right hand something on his belt without looking at it. And then he opened the door.

Cold breeze met me and I slowly got up. The ground I've known as hard and solid, was nothing in between anymore. I could've feel the ground eating me piece by piece. I don't know what to say, nor what to do. My legs felt weak. I've had no energy to move on. The ground had the superior strenght over me. I wanted to cry, but I have to hold it in. I'm not crying. Not infront of him. "Let's finish the work, you speaked of" Dwayne said, his hands on my back, giving me a light push to walk with him to the door. What is he talking about?

The door was now a few steps away.My palms were getting cold and wet at the same time. My blood pressure rised rapidly and I was able to hear my heart up to my ears. I really hope, that it doesn't come out. But after seeing what Dwayne done to me and what my parents could do to ME, I don't know it that could be impossible. Dwayne pressed the doorbell, letting his grip at my back loosen and putting it back into his pockets. I stepped a few steps back, hiding myself behind Dwayne. I'm way too afraid. I've runned away for a reason! I know that I wanted to face them again, but not now. This is too soon. My eyes were getting watery, but I gave my best to hold it in. Not now, not now! Maybe they are concerned about you and woul've been happy to see you again? 'Happy?! Holly you know that better. Thinking positive would not help you out in this situation!'