Poker | Jikook |

Chapter 43: My limit

        It was towards midnight, Jungkook was just finishing up his extra classes and studying afterwards. Jungkook looked at the clock as the time striked 12:00A.M midnight. Jungkook sighed feeling lonely that he hasn't seen Jimin all day. However it wasn't a surprise. Just when Jimin was so close to giving up alcohol... He went back in and by now, Jungkook wasn't surprised that he might be out gambling and drinking like always.

            "Bipolar Disorder..." Jungkook thought again and again in his head repeatedly. Those words seemed terrifying and the medications along with the symptoms Jimin would feel made Jungkook scared. He didn't want Jimin to come home and have one of those epileptic fits. "How do I handle someone with a Bipolar disorder? I know before I knew Jimin had this, I still couldn't figure him out and told him to stop crying everytime he did grow depressed...but now? This doubles. I'm back where I started and now I don't know what to do... I wasn't any help before! Ah, why is it so tough? Why is it so tough to communicate now? I don't even know the lies he must have hidden from me." Jungkook said to himself feeling helpless from Jimin's disorder.

          It wasn't an easy thing to handle since Jimin at times would switch through emotions constantly... Even on those moments he is close to exploding, he hides it away with a blank face. Just like the blank face he would mask his emotions with in Poker. Jimin has been so use to masking his emotions, it was tough for Jungkook to tell if he really had a Bipolar disorder... Yet, there would be moments where Jimin let his feelings slip and it confuses Jungkook on how the older man would switch from a scary erupting volcano, to a cute and loving boyfriend who hugs Jungkook close to kiss him repeatedly.

             Jungkook crawled onto Jimin's side of the bed as he let out a sigh, hugging Jimin's pillow like he hasn't seen his boyfriend in ages. Which did make sense since he was very attatched to his lover. Jungkook was close to breaking into tears, missing Jimin and feeling very sad for his lover. Who knows the many suicidal thoughts that went through his mind? Jimin was such a strong man for holding in those dark thoughts everyday. But even at times the strong rope around the tree must come loose eventually.

             Before Jungkook can go to sleep, he walked out of the bedroom and into the kitchen so he can atleast get himself a glass of water. Jungkook was silent, he combed his hair with his fingers on his way to the kitchen but suddenly, he heard the elevator open and suddenly Jungkook's eyes widened with excitement.

         "Jimin! You're back!" Jungkook said quickly running to the older who had on a black and white suit with black shades, a hand holding a huge suitcase and his scent was nothing but alcohol.

            "A-Ah... Jungkook... Not now, Baby boy~ I have a headache..." Jimin said walking forward while Jungkook stopped the man and dragged him by his hand, taking him to the couch... Yet Jimin snatched his hand back. Refusing to move. "Jungkook... I'm not in the mood for that." Jimin whispered, rubbing the temples of his head. "Later, okay?"

            "No, I'm not talking about that, I don't want you to feel hurt,  You must have a big headache.." Jungkook whispered as Jimin shook his head and only walked up to the couch to open his suitcase and drop the cash onto the couch. "D-Did you gamble?"

            "Yes.. And of course took a little alcohol... Yet that won't be an issue, right? Better not.." Jimin responded as he looked at Jungkook. "Get this all payed to your Mother or do you want to keep it?"

              "Send it to my Mother..." Jungkook replied. "Jimin, I thought we made a promise... I'm not trying to tick you off but, I just worry about you, Jimin~" Jungkook stated as Jimin tipped his shades down only to roll his eyes and face the suitcase.

          "I didn't ask you for that."

           "Jimin I-I know you didn't but... You don't know how lonely I felt... How sad I felt without you here."

          "Stand in line Jungkook, we've all been there." Jimin responded blankly as Jungkook turned to the medications still sitting on the table.

           "A man by the name of Min Yoongi came to drop off these medications for you." Jungkook stated, setting them ontop of the suitcase as Jimin locked his gaze at it.

            "You didn't see it.. Did you?" Jimin asked, taking off his shades to show he was already tearing up.

            "I did..." Jungkook replied, expecting Jimin to slap him but yet again, there was no issues at all. Jimin sobbed and moved in close to Jungkook, hugging and crying onto the younger's shoulder... Having Jimin cry in his arms despite the stench of alcohol, Jungkook thought this was the softest moment the two can share. Jimin would rarely cry or even make cute and flirty comments to his lover. That was over his Jimin's baisic attitude.

             "I-I want to be alone.." Jimin whispered as Jungkook pulled away from the hug and shook his head. "Jungkook... Listen to me!"

            "No... I-I know how it feels to be lonely for a long time.. Please don't do this! Surround yourself with me! I can help, Jimin..." Jungkook added, holding Jimin's hands in his. Only then, Jimin grew angry.

            "STOP TRYING TO HELP AND DO AS YOU'RE TOLD! Ugh, Maybe if you finally did as you're told, you wouldn't be here locked up!" Jimin said as Jungkook refused to move, resulting in Jimin suddenly pushing the younger onto the ground forcefully. "Room now!" Jimin demanded as Jungkook looked up, slightly tearing up and feeling a bit scared from bothering Jimin in the state he was in.

          It didn't take long before Jimin resumed tearing up, breaking into more tears after seeing how he treated the younger. Like the foolish rich man he thought he was. Jimin cupped his mouth and continued to cry, sitting back on the couch to weep. "I-I'm just like him!" Jimin managed to cry in his everlasting tears, making Jungkook hold his body up with his hands planted back onto the cold floor he was pushed to. Scared to stand up.

           "I hurt you.. Just like the way he harmed his women..." Jimin whispered, wiping his tears repeatedly. "Please.. Go into the room, I don't want to do it again... Please don't make me do it again, Jeon Jungkook. Listen to me for once." Jimin advised Jungkook, watching the older sit alone on the couch as he shook his head, not wanting to cry anymore.

            Jungkook stood up and walked up to Jimin to give the older man a kiss on the cheek. Showing that Jungkook could never hate Jimin for something like that. "It's okay...." Jungkook said but Jimin remained silent, turning his head away, feeling like Jungkook forced himself to say that since he did belong to Jimin now over their bet from a while back.

           Jungkook walked back into the room, seeing Jimin lay back on the couch. Confused on what he was doing with his life now. Jimin truely despised this confusing and sad part of his life.. He hated living everyday, knowing how angry, sad or happy he can get so easily.

         Having this disorder made Jimin troubled. It limited him from having friends and making relationships last long... That's why he couldn't help but to cry once he pushed Jungkook down roughly. Even if Jimin was only trying to help the love of his life, he ended up harming the boy instead physically and verbally.