Blue Wrists

Twenty-One

PoV: Yoongi
We ended up laying lazy around for the whole actual day.
Jimin kept his arms around my torso and held me close while we were watching some old action movies. I have to admit that it felt nice being so close to him, even tho I'm definitely not used to it.

Usually I avoid interraction with people but with Jimin it was something different. It felt good.

.

"Not hungry?" Jimin suddenly asks.

I shake my head.

He then sighs, blowing my hair. "You should eat~"

"I knooow" I hum slightly annoyed.

"Let's go. You gotta eat, and I'm hungry too" Jimin gets up and pulls me with him to the kitchen.

"mhhhh don't wannaaa" I whine as I sit down on the kitchen chair.

"Shuutt- You have to, Hyung." Jimin says and rolls his eyes.
I really want to try to eat once in a day, but today..

"Jimin, no.. Today I really can't.." I say quietly.

He looks at me and raises an eyebrow.

"M-Maybe later.. or tomorrow. Okay?" I look down in order to avoid the eye contact.

Jimin comes closer and lifts my chin, forcing me to look into his eyes.

"You can't? Not at all? You almost skipped meal yesterday.. I don't want your eating disorder to become worse, Yoongi.. Whats the problem? Do you still think about your parents?" he asks, clearly worried.

And it's true. I am thinking about my father and keep imagining terrible things that could happen to me and Jimin if he finds out that I'm here.

Besides I feel like.. I don't know, there are so many things going on in my head I can't even describe. Something about my feelings towards Jimin.. The sadnees about my trauma that Jimin now knows about. [Rape]

And I'm scared.. Jimin and I don't know each other that well but I already have the feeling that it would break the last pieces of my heart if he .. leaves me. And there are so many reasons to just leave me behind, I could understand it.

.
.
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PoV: Jimin
I place my hand on Yoongi's cheek and start caressing it with my thumb, trying to comfort him a little.

I really hate seeing him like this.. So lost and depressed. But I don't know how to help him...

Yoongi seems to hesitate for a few seconds before he actually leans into my touch and closes his eyes. Damn, what shall I do? He seems to get sadder with every second that passes.. It hurts me.

"Yoongi.." I move closer to him and rest my forhead against his.

"Tell me what can I do to make you feel better? You won't talk to me so how can I know?" I whisper worried.

"I don't know Jimin.. I.. really" He sniffs. Will he start crying now?

"I'm just scared of so many things that sometimes pop into my fucking mind.. I know it's annoying.. that my mood is changing so fast. I'm sorry, Jimin.." his voice starts shaking as he bursts out in tears.

At this point I just pick him up and place him on the kitchen counter to pull him into a tight hug.

"No, Yoongi. Please don't cry- You don't have to be afraid of anything. You are safe here and you're not alone, okay? I'll help you through everything, believe me"

I hold him as close as possible and stroke his back, trying to calm him down But my words seem to make him cry even more.

"Y-You don't even know what you're talking about.. I did so many bad things that would make you leave me, Jimin. You're just naive and want to be nice." he whines.

"What bad things ?! You keep saying that you don't deserve shit but you never say the reason, how can I know then! Even if you'd be a murderer I wouldn't be able to leave you behind ! Why are you.. Why won't you get that ??!" I shout madly.

My anger seemed to shut Yoongi up as he tried to stop crying and push me away. But of course he wasn't strong enough,.. too weak.

"You're lying." Yoongi sniffs
"Big liar"

"I'm not, Yoongi. " I whisper more calmed.

"Go away" he pushes his knee against my stomach

"I won't" I say.
"Now stop being so glomy. I hate seeing you like this"

...

" I'm sorry.." he mumbles and looks down.

I sigh and wipe his tears away, caressing his cheek lightly.

"Can't you just accept the fact that I like you and want to be with you..?" I ask desperately.

"...I-It's hard to believe, you know?"

He wanted to say something else but I just cut him off by pressing my lips on his.