BTS Family - Family matters, NamJin

15.

Namjoons POV:

+++++++++++Breaking News!+++++++++

Yesterday evening, Kim Namjoon (28, Producer for BigHit entertainment) and Kim Seokjin (30, "Awake") were spotted in a Park near their company, enjoying each others company!
Both of them were once married, while Kim Namjoon made headlines with the divorce of his former wife, Kim Seokjin had to cry over his deceased wife Kim Hye Ri (+27, model).
Now, half a year later, both of them were spotted on a date? We could see very intimidate gestures and hugs. What do you think of the new relationship between those two celebrities? Both male? For more updates stay tuned on dailyK-news!

I stared at Jackson's phone in disbelieve. This couldn't be! Not even a day!
We dated not even a day yet!

What was going on? And what asshole took that damn pictures?

Pictures, that showed Jin blushing, staring at my eyes, showing our intertwined hands, my pecks on his forehead.

"Congrats?" Jackson laughed and I shot a glare at him. That wasn't appropriate right now. Not now.

"Dude chill!" he raised offended his hands and raised an eyebrow, while I fell back in my chair, feeling lifeless.

In the morning I felt fucking amazing. Happy to no extent, I could have hugged the whole world, now some damn black ink on a damn website let my sandcastle crumble and fall.

Fuck!

This was horrible. The consequences... no, I don't want to think of them!

We were in Korea, and in Korea dating or loving the same gender wasn't really accepted. Especially if you have kids and were married before.

I thought, I really thought, that we could figure something out until we decided to out ourselves. We could have managed this. We could have been prepared.

But now...

Fuck!

We weren't that popular anymore before. Both going slower, because of our families, now we skyrocketed. I just knew that the internet was running havoc and society searched up our stories, digging out everything they could find, just to let us fall deep.

And I thought our love was blooming prettily, unfolding silently in all its beauty. But then a prick found it and decided to tore leaves apart, hurting it, damaging it.

I had no idea how Jin would react, but I knew this story had a big impact at our lives, killing our careers and the careers of our kids, as offspring of two gays.

Damn! Damn it all!

I was so angry, I could destroy the whole studio. I wanted to shout and I wanted to cry, I wanted to yell at someone and then ran to the base of the damn website and damage it completely. I wanted to yell and knock some sense in the Korean society for being so old fashioned and racistic.

I pulled my hair with my right hand, while my left acted on its own and scrolled down the comment section.

Hate comments everywhere. Simply everywhere.

Saying that we were sick and cases for mental institutions, that we were scum and trash, that we don't deserve any support, that we should die and should offer our kids to adoption, in order not to affect them with the disease 'gayness' as long as we still can.

Replies to that last comment were, that it was already too late and my kids should simply die with us.

Comments about that we should be pushed out of the country and so on and on.

I felt shocked. I felt numb. Where did all those hate come? Why? What was so wrong with loving the same gender?

Don't you fall in love with a person? The personality is what mattered, not their gender, right?

"Joon? Are you all right?" Jackson asked, now worried, placing a hand on my back, staring down at me.

At least he wasn't a homophobe. No, in fact, he was married to Mark quite a time now. But they kept their relationship hidden from the world. And that was smart, as we could see now. Even though that hiding lead to severe arguments between the couple, so big, that Jackson sometimes slept on my couch.

At least they were happy most of the time.

Me and Jin... We just started out and I was really afraid, that our whole relationship would break down on this matter.

There I was, finally happy again, after a long time, thinking naively of a beautiful future, just to get this destroyed the next 24 hours.

Was I cursed?

Wasn't I allowed to become fully happy?

Why?

This would change our lives totally. It would make everything different, and I knew that hard times were approaching. Really damn hard times, full of hatred.

I just hoped, that Jin and I were going to stick together, that we went together through this storm. This catastrophe.

That, he wouldn't give up on me. Because sure as the hell was on fire, I wouldn't give up on him.

I refused.

I refused to give society what they wanted. I liked him. Very much. And I would hold onto this.

"Joon?" Jackson asked again, and I just shook my head, still pulling my hair.

"Hey!" his voice was soft now. "You will figure this out together. I am here for you! I know this is total shit and unfair and just an unbelievable fuckary, but Joon, you can go through this okay? You are strong and your Jin is also strong."

I know I should've been thankful for his words.

I know I should feel grateful for his support, but I couldn't.

Not if he hid his relationship with Mark for years.

He lived with the fear, for sure, but he had no idea how it was when you're shortly build sandcastle of love and dreams were falling down, under harsh attack, not able to defend itself because it was new and unstable.

Abruptly I stood up, and pushed Jackson aside, throwing his phone after him.

I knew it was mean, but my mind blanked out, I couldn't help myself. I was raging and hurt, afraid for my future, afraid for my happiness, afraid for Jin and our sons.

Our sons!
Fuck!

News spread like a wildfire, especially such news. What was, if they were bullied right now because of that?

What if they were harmed because of that?

I knew for sure, that one of Taes caregivers in the day-care was homophobic as fuck.

Damn!

Without further thought, I grabbed my car keys and stormed out the studio, slamming the door shut.

Not caring about the disgusted and sorry looks from the stuff that I passed. It was Saturday and still busy. Idols never sleep.

Raging, with anxiety rising in my heart big time, I ran to my car and sped to my sons, to rescue them.

To lock us in our home, where nobody could attack us, where we would be safe.

Fuck! This was all a disaster! 




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Triple update!


Now the story builds up speed :)

I hope you like it!

And, yes I know, I suck at writing news reports :/