Delicious Rose

8

Rose

Resting my head against the passenger window I look up into the sky, stars shine furiously as the night drops like a heavy curtain, it's beautiful. The absence of light is so complete that not even shadows survive.

"You okay babe?" The sound of my dad's soft voice turns my attention towards him, his eyes already on me and then back at the winding road in front of us, his hands gripping tighter against the leather steering wheel, his knuckles white from the pressure.

"Yeah, just tired." Giving him a reassuring smile. Silence falling upon us again, the truth is, I'm tired, so tired, tired of my life.

"What's going on in that brain of yours?" He questions me again with a big grin on his kind face, I've always felt close enough to tell my dad anything and everything and he accepts my plans and wants me to chase my dreams.

"I'm just so tired of mum treating me like a child, I know it's a while off but I keep telling her I want to leave and study in London. She thinks I should stay with her and work at the office." His grip tightens and his face falls.

"I know she only wants you around because Daniel's gone but she needs to accept you want a life and you have a career goal; a dream and you should pursue it." His voice strong and full of pride. I shake my head at him looking down at my fingers, rubbing my thumbs together.

"Well don't worry for now; we have two years to figure something out." Dad knows how badly I want to work for a book publisher. I have tried to talk to her about it, but for some reason she can't let me go. She struggled with Daniel, but she hates the thought of me going.

"I am so proud you are going after what you love, I just want you to have the best life." His face full of sadness, his grip tightens up against the black leather again. Holding back my tears I give him another nod.

"Maybe you need to mention it to her again, have you spoken to Wayne about it? Could he help?" I shudder thinking about him, my disgusting step dad could rot in hell, but I can't tell my dad that, so I just shake my head to avoid an unwanted conversation.

"I think you have so much potential Rose, you need to believe in yourself." His big hand reaching out and ruffling the back of my head. He always knows what to say, he makes me feel like I can do anything if I keep at it, anything in this whole world.

Silence floods the car again, looking out towards the empty road I spot a light in the distance, its bright but unclear as if it were hiding in the fog, as it gets closer, it starts to form into two headlights. The speed of the vehicle is going to fast in the country lane, there is no space for both cars to pass through in time. My dad's voice full of fear as he yells my name. Instantly everything goes black, but the ringing of my dad's scream lingers longer.

The strong smell of a burning chemical hits my nose, my vision blurred as I slowly open my eyes. Trying to move my fingers now impossible and a sharp pitch ringing in my ears, I slowly manage to move my head to the right. My dad's sat still in his seat facing me, his warm brown eyes full of fear and pain, covered in blood and not a single breath leaving his partially open lips.

"Daddy?" I whisper, no movement coming from him, I feel bile rising in my throat and my heart beginning to speed up in terror. Trying to keep myself calm, I reach out and touch his face. His body still unresponsive. And his kind eyes still watch me.

A burning sensation ripping through my throat as I scream out in pain. I move closer to him, trying not to hurt him. Touching his face and arms do nothing, I need to get a response. Anything. He needs to wake up, he has to wake up. Trying to move closer to him is now impossible, an excruciating pain hitting my left thigh, the pain making me gag instantly.
The more I try and control my breathing and shuffle closer to my dad, the worse my body hurts. The shock leaving my body, everything begins to hurt more and more by the second. It's unbearable, the pain is blinding as it shoots through my whole body.

I cannot contain myself from screaming at the realization of what has happened, the sound of distant blurred voices and sirens become more visible. My door is pulled open suddenly and a fireman is cutting through my seatbelt. My vision blurring as I feel myself getting weaker and weaker.

I close my eyes and feel my body being lifted out of the car and onto a stretcher, trying to stay awake I watch the fireman check my dad's body, as I'm being pulled further away from him. I'm trying to fight away from the people dragging me away from him but I'm strapped to the gurney as I scream out for him. I have the worst feeling that I will never see him again, I was right.

I jolt up from my bed, my body soaking in sweat, tears falling effortlessly down my cheeks. Within seconds Daniel, Lee, Chloe and Darcy are running through my bedroom towards me. Daniel reaching me first, he grabs hold of me and pulls me to his chest. I don't stop the tears from falling as I cry into my brother's top.

"Is it dad?" He whispers to me, I cry even louder as I remember everything.

"I miss him so much." Every now and then I wake up screaming and crying for my dad, the nightmares are life shattering. It's not just a nightmare, it's a memory, one I will never forget. I haven't had one for a while, I never forget what happened though. As the years pass, they became less frequent, but it still hurts the same.

"I know, I do too, I'm so sorry." His body shaking as I squeeze his top for a better grip, my bedroom is silent for a few minutes as I try to control myself. I look up to both of my best friends, their faces sad for me. They understand, they all understand. I've never been the same since that night, Theo knew that too. The night will haunt me forever, which night took the best man in the entire world. He died beside me, I wish I died instead.

"I have a glass of water if this helps?" Luca's voice soft and full of concern as he walks over to me and Daniel, he bends down and passes me the cold glass. His eyes bloodshot and sad as I sip the water carefully. The cold liquid feels amazing as I gulp down the entirety of glass.

"Thank you." I place the glass back into his hand, his smile gentle and his eyes studying me with wonder. He wonders what I dreamt, what happened to me?

"Any time." He places his large hand on mine before standing up and walking out of my room.

"Want me to stay with you?" Chloe sits down on the bed, I shake my head and disconnecting my body from Daniel.

"I'll be okay, I'm sorry for waking you." I apologise trying so hard not to remember what happened, Daniel kisses my forehead before standing up.

"Don't ever be sorry for that." I slam my body back into my cushions and closing my eyes, hoping it won't keep me awake.

I refuse to get out of bed, the nightmare I haven't experienced in months has taken over my sanity. The memories from that night have left me unnerved and ruined, my dad was my best friend. The night he died my life turned upside down, I was left with two broken ribs and a large cut on my thigh. My father lost his life instantly, every day I wish it was me who was taken instead of him.

Wayne, my grotesque step-father. Who my mother finally decided to divorce shortly after my father's death. I lost my mind and came clean, I told Daniel and mum what he was doing, he was sent to prison. Only a five-year sentence, he'll be out soon.

Everyone couldn't believe he only got five-years for rape and sexual assault of a minor. I haven't thought about him in a while. I never told anyone what he did to me, how he touched me, made me vulnerable and weak until I lost my father. Not even Theo knew when we first started dating, once I lost my father, I had to tell someone. I lost myself, I didn't care how people looked at me. I needed to let it out.

Maybe that's why Theo cheated on me, I'm sure he can't be that cruel, he defended me, he supported me through my father's death and through court with Wayne, he supported me through fucking everything.