Angel eyes

Page twenty five

Jess's p.o.v

The next few days were a bit of a blur, everyday the same. I'd get up, go to rehearsals, then go home and cry myself to sleep. It was like I was on autopilot. I missed Shannon.

He called all the time, but I never answered. I'd erase his messages without listening to them. He'd send me flowers, I'd make the delivery guy take them back. Tomo called trying to pursuade me to speak to Shannon, but I couldn't. I felt if I heard his voice, my heart would break all over again.

I tried my best to get on with my life, but people started to notice the change in me. I wasn't eating much. I'd lost weight and my costumes were loose. I wasn't as focused in rehearsals. Every time I did a dance scene, I remembered that first night in 'Midnight'. Shannon's hands on my skin, the taste of his lips. I'd lose myself for a moment, thinking I was dancing for him again.

Ryan and Elsa did their best to distract me. They'd try to take me for dinner or the movies, anything to get me out my apartment. But all I wanted to do was sleep. I drempt of Shannon every night. Some nights we were making love, sometimes just sat laughing and holding hands. Then there were the dreams that played out our last phone conversations. How he'd accused me of cheating. The harsh words he'd said. Whatever I drempt, I always woke up crying.

I wanted so much to be with him again. To feel his touch, kiss his lips. But it had been so hard, being together, but apart at the same time. No, it was better this way...or least it would be...eventually.

I'd finished for the day and was going into my apartment, when I heard a familiar voice call my name. I turned to see Shannon standing in the hallway. S "Hi." I swallowed hard, doing my best not to run into his arms. Me "Hi." It was all I could manage. S "How are you?" He took a step towards me. Me "Good" I lied. He moved closer, making me step back. He stopped, S "You've lost weight." Me "Thanks" I forced a smile. S "That wasn't a compliment...you look ill." He reached up to touch my cheek, but I turned away. He pulled his hand back and I could see he looked hurt.

Me "What are you doing here Shannon?" S "I miss you Jess. Can we talk...please." Me "Shannon, it's too hard...you hurt me. I can't be with someone who doesn't trust me." He looked down, ashamed. S "I'm sorry Jess...I was so insecure. I thought you didn't want me anymore." I wanted to scream at him that I loved him and there could never be anyone else! Instead I stood there frozen, just trying to breath.

He moved quickly so he was stood right in front of me. This close I could see how tired he looked, like he hadn't slept in a week. S "Please Jess...I need you." He stroked my face. This time I let him, trying hard to keep the tears from falling. Me "Shannon..." He rested his forehead onto mine. S "I love you Jess." I tried to move away from him, but he grabbed my face in his hands. I could see the tears in his eyes. S "Tell me you don't love me. Say it and you'll never see me again." He stared straight into my eyes, searching for a response. I couldn't hold the tears back any longer. Me "I..." Then his lips were on mine and the world melted away.