Chapter Thirty-Six

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Jisung took a deep breath. He wiped at his eyes, though he knew his face was red and blotchy, his eyes bloodshot and puffy. This was not how an Alpha ought to look. He walked into his bathroom and turned on the shower.

He undressed slowly, his limbs still stiff, his heart still heavy. The warm water was a slight relief. He didn't make a move to grab the shampoo or the soap, he simply stood there, allowing the water to wash over him.

Take all his pain down the drain.

He knew it wouldn't happen, but he could still hope. He hoped this shower at least got rid of the traces of the sobs that had bubbled out of him in the middle of the night.

As he stepped out again, he pulled on the first thing he could find that Dongwook would have approved of. Cargo pants and a black t-shirt. He reached for his sneakers, hand pausing a few centimetres away. He shook his head and grabbed the combat boots he'd gotten a while ago but never wore.

He had to look at least somewhat intimidating. He needed to command respect – from his pack and others. He wasn't just Han Jisung anymore; he was the Alpha of the Sun pack, and he had to act like it.

Even when he felt as though he would crumble any second now.

He schooled his features and, with one last deep breath, he pushed the door to his bedroom open. There weren't many wolves in this hall, and he briefly wondered where Minho was.

"Hyunjin." He called through the mind link.

"Yes?" He could hear the slight nervousness in his friend's voice, and his steps faltered before he closed his eyes and sighed.

"Meet me out front." He paused for a moment. "Please."

As he progressed to the more populated areas of the packhouse, he walked by without greeting anyone, his face collected and cold. It was a façade, one he hoped he could keep up long enough. He pretended he could not hear the murmurs about him, pretended he could not see that some of his packmates looked at him in disgust or fear, or even both.

He pretended nobody was there except himself.

Hyunjin already stood in front of the packhouse, hands tucked behind his back when Jisung emerged, shoulders stiff. He looked up and jogged up to meet him. "Alpha." He bowed his head slightly, and the other couldn't help but cringe.


Now he understood why Dongwook hated it when he called him that. A lump formed in his throat, and he cleared it quickly. "Please don't." He said it with a small smile, though it was tense and strained. Hyunjin nodded quickly and turned to walk alongside him.

Though it still did not quite feel like normal; Hyunjin was one step behind him. His fists clenched discretely and he sucked in a tight, quiet breath. He did not want this respect from his best friend.

They travelled down to the dungeons from the outside entrance, and he nodded briefly at the wolves standing guard. There was only one cell in use. Jisung stopped abruptly in front of it, peering at the wolf shrouded in the darkness of his cell.

"Finally decided to show up?" He hated the smugness in that voice. "Why don't we fight again and see who wins?" He hated the cruel twinkle in those eyes as he came into the light.

Jisung leaned towards the silver bars of the cage, lips stretching in a bloodless sneer. "Last time we fought," he began, eyes glowing their ridiculously bright gold, "I beat your ass."

The wolf's eyes flashed and he growled in response, but Jisung could see the fear growing there; the weasel was looking for a chance to escape, to cheat his way out of his punishment.

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