Bleeding Souls (Daryl Dixon)

29. New Girl With Answers

          After June left with Glenn and Maggie, I took Carl and Oscar to help me clear out the prison the best we can. Truth being told, I know that Carl and I both need to get our minds off other things. I know I was being a dick when I walked out of June's cell.

           Once we got further into the prison, we rounded a corner where a walker was barely pushing on a door. I squinted my eyes and watched the door carefully.

           "Check it out, man. Must have missed it last night." Oscar said to me. I turn around and quickly look at him and then back to the door. I didn't see the point in wasting energy on walker that isn't a problem at the moment.

           "It's probably just one or two of 'em. Don't look like they got much fight." I say to Oscar as I push my finger against the door. I turn my head and see Carl slouching around the halls of the prison. I sigh at the scene in front of me. Sort of reminding me of my time after my mother died. I turn around to Oscar and motion my head to the door with the walkers behind it. "They ain't goin' nowhere. We'll take care of it on the way back." I say to him before walking up to Carl.

          Once I get next to Carl, I whistle at him to bring him out of his thoughts. He looks up at me. "Come on." I say to him. He nods his head at me. As we start getting further into the prison, I decide that maybe telling my story about my mom will let him know that he isn't alone. I clear my throat and put my flashlight back up to make some light.

          "You know, my mom, she liked her wine. She liked to smoke in bed. Virginia Slims." I say to Carl as I use my finger to pry open a door to get a look inside. Once I see that the room is clear, I continue with my story. "I was playin' out with the kids in the neighborhood. I could do that with Merle gone. They had bikes, I didn't. We heard sirens getting louder. They jumped on their bikes, ran after it, you know, hoping to see something worth seeing." I say to Carl. I pry open a door to get a good look into the room and once I see that it's clear, I continue to tell the story.

          "I ran after them, but I couldn't keep up. I ran around a corner and saw all my friends lookin' at me. Hell, I saw everybody lookin' at me." I say to Carl with the memory still very much alive in my mind. "Fire truck everywhere. People from the neighborhood. It was my house they were there for. That was my mom in bed. Burnt down to nothin'. That was the hard part. You know, she was just gone. Erased. Nothing left of her." I say to Carl with heartbreak in my voice that I hope he didn't hear. My mom wasn't the best woman, mother or human being on the planet, but she was my mother.

          Once I got myself together, I continued. "People said it was better that way." I say to Carl with a chuckle. "I don't know. Just made it seem like it wasn't real, you know?" I say to Carl to finish the story. I heard Carl let out a breath and I turn and look at him. "I shot my mom." Carl said to me. I already knew the story, but I knew that Carl needed to talk about it. "She was out. Hadn't turned yet. I ended it. It was real." Carl said to me. I look down at the ground away from him. I couldn't imagine killing someone you love with your whole heart.

          "Sorry about your mom." I hear Carl say to me. I look up at him and bend down to catch his attention. Carl looks back up at me and I give him a serious face. "I'm sorry about yours." I say to him. I rub Carl's shoulder with my hand before pushing him forward to continue our mission. Smiling at the fact that I used something private about myself to help someone else.

           For the next thirty minutes or so, we didn't come across any walkers and for that I was thankful. I was leading Carl and Oscar when I heard Oscar basically squeal in excitement. "Oh, that's what I'm talking about." I hear Oscar say. Carl and I both turn around and walk towards the cell Oscar just walked into. We both entered when we saw Oscar down on the ground with a pair of slippers in his hands. I shook my head at him. "What the hell you need slippers for?" I ask him. Oscar looks up at me like I had just hit him. "You know, end of the day, relaxing." Oscar says to me. I looked down at the slippers and then back up to him. He gave me a small chuckle, but it  was short due to us hearing a walker growl behind us.