Lockdown 》 Yoonmin

> 140 <

Hearing the doorbell echo throughout his home, Jimin tucks the letter into the drawer beside his bed before hustling downstairs to answer the door. He was expecting it to either be his neighbour, who might be asking if he had seen their dog since the little pug always seemed to get out and find his way onto Jimin's property— or maybe his friends who had decided to come check on him after what happened. However, when he opened the door, he was surprised to find Namjoon and Jungkook standing right outside.

"Hi. Can we talk to you?" Namjoon grins. Jimin nods and steps aside to welcome the two boys into his home.

Jungkook slips off his sneakers, "Sorry, this was a bit sudden. But we thought this was the best option," he places the pair onto the rack by the door.

"About Yoongi, right?" Jimin says, voice low and gentle.

Namjoon and Jungkook look at each other before nodding and Jimin gestures for them to walk in and take a seat on the sofa.

"How... How is he?" Jimin had to ask. It was probably a stupid question, because he knew very well that the older was hurting just as much as he was. But he had to be assured that Yoongi was at least trying to get through it.

"Not fine. Same as you." Namjoon bluntly answers.

Jimin sighs, "I... I didn't want to hurt him. It just, slipped out, I guess. The moment he told me the truth, I just couldn't handle facing him at that time."

Jungkook nods, "We're not here to interrogate you about your actions or to tell you what to do,"

"We're here because we wanted to help you understand what he did," Namjoon continues.

"I told him that I know there's a reason why he can fuck up sometimes, but... I never heard him out. I feel like shit," Jimin chuckles with bitterness.

"Assuming you guys are pretty close, he's probably mentioned something about being afraid of being left behind, yes?" Jungkook questions.

Jimin nods, "He has. He said I don't need someone like him because there's lots about him I don't know yet. He also said that when he found out I was in love with him, he got scared because some people that loved him left him....And... he wasn't ready for me to leave him."

Namjoon sighs, "We figured he'd say that. He's been living with that fear for years. We always reassure him that he's got us, but there's something in him that can't seem to let go of that lingering thought that he'll eventually lose everyone."

"Look, we're not in the place to tell you what we're about to. But, we didn't just want to watch him crumble down again and do nothing about it, " Jungkook adds.

Jimin's breaths start to get heavier. He knew he was about to discover something important about Yoongi– about the person he loves– yet he couldn't help but feel anxious. How would he react? How much will he blame things on himself after for not hearing Yoongi out? How selfish would he think of himself? How was he going to approach Yoongi?

"It started when he was about nine," Namjoon starts, "One night he woke up, and right when he stepped out of his bedroom, all he saw was a glimpse of his dad before the front door slammed shut. His mom told him that his father had to work abroad immediately, that it would take years and years before Yoongi would see him again. He was confused, and kept on asking his mom everyday if his dad ever called, or even sent letters. She always told him no. Yoongi thought that maybe his dad was just really busy, and he tried to understand and brush it off. But when Yoongi spotted his father outside of a convenience store, before he could approach him, he witnessed a woman come out of the store and got in the car with Yoongi's dad. That's when he started to add it all up. After that, he kept asking people, if he's worth being loved. I can't remember how many times he's asked us, or how many times he asked his mom and everyone else around him. Obviously we all told him yes, but he never seemed to believe it because, if his father couldn't love him enough for him to send Yoongi something to let him know that he was well, then maybe Yoongi wasn't worth enough."

"A few years after that, he was able to build a strong relationship with this kid named Daewon," Jungkook added.

"I know him! We ran into him at the mall once, and he was a bitch."

"Him and hyung used to be really good friends, Daewon had an older brother that treated Yoongi hyung as if he was his brother too. I guess for Yoongi, it was some sort of comfort because the brother in a way, filled that little gap that hyung's dad left in his life. He was that older man Yoongi looked up to. And he did love Yoongi, otherwise he wouldn't have sacrificed himself for him."

Jimin frowns, "What do you mean?"

"Daewon's brother cared for Yoongi hyung so much that the day it was hyung who was supposed to get hit by that car, he pushed him out of the way. Daewon's brother was put in a coma. And he hasn't waken up ever since. To this day, he's still in bed, and nobody knows how much longer it will be for him to wake up, or, if he even will."

"That's why Daewon hates Yoongi..." Jimin concludes.

"Yeah," Namjoon replies, "After that accident he went around telling people that Yoongi was the reason why his brother was in a coma. And he somehow made people believe that Yoongi would only bring harm or misfortune, so people didn't want to be around him anymore. Every friend Yoongi had, vanished from his life almost instantly. Well, of course, except for us. There was even a time when Daewon made Yoongi feel so miserable that he... he attempted to leave us. You know... permanently. But, Jungkook found him, thankfully."

Jimin wanted to cry. All those people that left Yoongi... it was because they never heard Yoongi out. Never considered how Yoongi felt. They made Yoongi blame himself for the reason why people leave him for so long. Made him so wretched to the point Yoongi just wanted to disappear. And Jimin wanted to punch himself in the face multiple times for just that. He was no different than everyone else.

"I... I'm just like all of them..." Somehow he managed to keep his tears from falling.

"You'll be like them if you decide to leave him completely without talking to him and asking him how he's feeling. But, I know you're not going to do that," Jungkook convinces him cordially, "I believe that you're not one of those people."

"What makes you say that?"

"Because I know that you'll be the first person to come back to listen to him."

"Jimin, Yoongi loves you. We can see it. And we all know you love him too. Now that you know why he was so afraid of telling you, it's up to you both to figure out your away around this whole thing." Namjoon says amiably.

- - -

You guys have probably seen my announcements regarding my conflict of staying to write on this platform or not. Please read my latest announcement. (Belated) Merry Christmas to you all.