The Rebellion (BTS Rap Line x Reader)

Yoongi POV 3 - Sleepover

She tossed and turned like the world was torturing her in her sleep.

I knew the feeling.

It had been days since Hoseok left to find the others, and Y/N hadn't slept soundly since he left, despite the amount of chores I had made her do. I could tell she was sore, weak, and drained... words she would hate to hear if I ever said them aloud.

This woman... as if being weak was the worst thing to call another human being. Foolish, selfish, greedy, insane, evil... those were adjectives people should worry about. Not weak. Weakness had limits. Boundaries. A place to rest. But this woman had no limits, no boundaries, and no rest. She refused to back down. Refused to accept what was in front of her.

Yujin was the same way. And there was only one way to describe her now.

Dead.

If Y/N couldn't accept her limitations and weaknesses, she would end up the same way.

Jin had been giving her orders recently, and I allowed it. For now.

"Where is she?" I asked Jin, who was unpacking the last of a current trade.

He paused before answering. "The gardens. Why?"

"Just checking."

"You've been keeping a close watch on her."

"Your point?"

He shrugged. "Just an observation."

There was a glint of presumption in his eyes.

"I keep watch on everyone," I said, stepping in closer. "Remember that."

He said nothing, but gave a small curl of his lip as he nodded.

I turned back towards the gardens, passing by Hoseok's tent on the way. Damn him. If he didn't survive, then what? I'd have the blood of the entire Jung family on my hands? He was an unruly bastard, but he was the best fighter I ever had.

And what's more... he was the closest friend I had.

Not that I'd tell him. He already had too much power over me. He was cocky enough.

And also, if he didn't make it, what was I going to do about the woman?

I reached the gardens, stopping when I saw her. She was working alright, but her eyes were glazed over as she mindlessly shoveled dirt into a pile. I shook my head. I supposed she couldn't stop thinking of him. This obsession was going to swallow her whole.

Something in me couldn't bear to watch her get consumed by the darkness.

She didn't even hear me as I approached her.

"Focus on your work, woman."

She looked up at me, seemingly snapping out of her daze. I reached down and pulled her up to her feet, looking at her dirtied hands.

The blood on your mother's hands is because of me. The fault is mine. I should have been the man to decorate her fingers in gold. If I had... she would still be alive... her hands healing the wounds in both of us.

I shook my father's words out of my head. Why was I thinking about that now?

"You need to sleep," I said to Y/N.

She shook her head. "I can't."

I clenched my teeth. How deep was she in her feelings for him that she couldn't sleep unless he was next to her? All those nights next to him... just how far did their relationship go?

"You're that loyal to him?" I asked. "Are you so attached that you need him to sleep?"

It came out angier than I wanted. Why did it bother me anyways? It had nothing to do with me. She could stay sleepless for all I cared. It's not like we —

"It's not that," she said, her voice oddly cracking.

"Then what?"

Her hands shook in mine, then steadied. I caught her wild gaze before she turned her head down.

"I hear the screaming when I shut my eyes," she whispered.

I took in a long breath, looking down at her hands again. I could almost see the blood on them.

The fault is mine...

I cleaned the dirt from her fingers as if it would erase the memory. But I knew better than anyone that blood on your hands couldn't be erased.

"Don't sleep in the medic tent," I commanded. "Sleep somewhere you feel safe."

"I don't feel safe without Hoseok."

I bit my tongue. I expected that reaction, but hearing it still set my chest on fire. As if I hadn't been here. As if I hadn't tended to her for the last three days. As if I hadn't watched her every night at dinner since the day she came here.

But none of that mattered. Compared to Hoseok, I was a ghost. It was what I had wanted... yet at the same time, what I hated most.

"You're a pain in the ass, woman."

Her weak smiled filled my eyes until there was nothing else.

"Yes," she whispered. "I know."

~~~~~~~~~

"That's the last of it," I said, handing Jimin the flask. "Make sure he drinks it twice more before sunrise."

Jimin nodded, taking the flask and holding it to his chest. "Are you alright, Boss?"

I rubbed my aching eyes. "I'm fine."

"You haven't been sleeping."

"I've been working."

"You're going to get ill. Then we won't have any medics."

I folded my hands under my chin, annoyed at his logic.

"The men here are stable," he continued. "Let me look after them tonight. If there's any trouble, I'll come for you."

He gave me a light smile and walked away, and I didn't have the energy to argue with him.

I wandered out of the medic tent, looking around camp. It was cold and empty, like it had been when I was a child. Like the day after my mother had been executed. Like the day after Yujin's death.

Nights as still as this - nights filled with the anticipation of death - how could anyone sleep?

And the woman... was she sleeping?

No. She wouldn't sleep. She would be awake in her tent, looking where he slept, thinking about things she never said or did...

I knew because that's what I did with Yujin. So many times.

The terrible thing? I was relieved Hoseok wasn't there next to her to hear what she had to say.

But someone needed to be beside her tonight.

And tonight... I think I needed someone next to me, too.

~~~~~~~~~~~
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