The secrets we keep

Chapter 73

I bit my lip.
"I-I need to go."
He didn't say anything when I got up and
rushed away.

My breathing was heavy when I returned to the main building.
I fled to the girls' bathroom and locked myself in a stall. I stayed there until my hands weren't shaking and my heart wasn't racing anymore.

When the bell rang, I headed back to class and sat in my seat, pretending like nothing had happened.
But something did happen. I wasn't sure what exactly that was, but I couldn't shake of this weird feeling in my stomach.

I was waiting by the car, with a stoic expression on my face, when I spotted him.
He was standing at the entrance of the school, talking to some friends. I stared at him and smiled.
He slapped another boy on the chest as they both laughed about something.
And then our eyes met, but only for a second before Jackson stepped in front of me with
a smile on his face.
"Ready?" He asked and opened the door for me.
I nodded and glanced to where Kyle had been a second ago but he had vanished.
I slumped down on the backseat and stared out of the window.
"You okay?" Liam glanced back at me from the passenger seat.
"Stomach ache," I lied and he made a pity face "We'll get you something for that at home."
I realized that it wasn't really a lie, my stomach did hurt, but there wasn't any medicine that could help that.

I had deserted myself from my brothers and stayed in bed all day. It felt like I had been punched in the stomach and at the same time I felt like I was going crazy. Because of one little conversation. Because of this realization that I wasn't ready to accept yet. Because if I did, it would wreck everything that I had built here. And I wasn't sure if I could survive that.

There was a hesitant knock on my door.
„C'min," I called and Tyler's face appeared in the doorway.
"Mind if I join in on your sulking?"
"I'm not sulking."
He closed the door behind him and slumped onto my bed.
"Then what's going on? You've been weird all day."
"I just don't feel good.."
"Liar," He grabbed my phone and placed it on the nightstand.
"Hey!" I protested and reached over him to get it, but he blocked me and raised his eyebrow.
„C'mon just tell me who I need to punch."
„Punch yourself, dickhead," I threw my pillow at his face to which he replied with a chuckle.
„Come oooonnn," he pouted "You're scary when you're so quiet. Yell at me or something so that I know you're still you."
"I don't wanna yell at you," I rested my head on the pillow and stared at the ceiling.
"Who are you and what have you done
with my sister?"
"Shut up, or I'll make Jackson my favorite brother."
He gasped.
"You wouldn't dare!"
I laughed and slapped his arm.
He smiled, pleased that he'd managed to make
me laugh.
"If you don't wanna talk, fine. But I'm staying to make sure you don't go all weird again."
I nodded and made some more space for him on the bed. I didn't mind him staying, we usually hung out together anyway. And he was a welcome distraction to that weird feeling in my stomach.

"You shouldn't keep all the shit that happens to yourself, ya know?" He poked my arm "It's not healthy."
„Oh you're one to talk. You're just as bad as me at those things," I rolled my eyes.
"Well at least I don't disappear into my room when I'm dealing with shit."
"No, you go around punching people."
He flipped me off and we returned to a comfortable silence.

"What if I did something stupid?" I asked.
He didn't look at me.
„How stupid?"
„Like Jackson would probably murder me-stupid."
"You'd tell us. And we'd figure it out without anyone getting murdered."
"Or hurt," I added.
"Have you met this family?" He smirked "People around us tend to get hurt."
"That's deep," I chuckled.
"I meant that we always beat the shit out of people, you idiot," He rolled his eyes.
"How am I the one that has to see a psychologist and not you guys?" He snickered and shrugged.

„So what'd you do, huh?" Ty gently pushed me as he positioned himself on the bed.
„Nothing," I answered, which wasn't a lie „Yet."
"Well then what's the problem?"
"I don't know.. I'm just confused okay. I have no idea what I should do."
"Well do you have to make the decision right now?" He raised his eyebrows.
"Noo.. I guess not."
"Then why worry about it now," He shrugged "I got like ten exams next week. Do you see me worrying?" He grinned.
"That's-.. I mean-. You should really start studying," I laughed.
"Nahh," He smirked "It'll work out I'm sure."
I sighed.
"You're terrible at advice."
He grinned proudly, as if I had just complimented him.

Hey there, just a general question:
How is Corona affecting your life/ country?

My school is probably going to close soon some Unis and schools already have and Yeahh it's kinda getting out of control. (Germany)