Lost and Fallen (Memories #1)

Chapter 31

"Anong ginagawa mo dito?" malamig niyang sabi.

Bagay na pinagtataka ko kasi bakit mukha siyang galit? Diba dapat ako ang galit sa aming dalawa kasi ako ang niligawan tapos makikita ko lang ang suitor ko na may kayakap na iba matapos ang ilang araw na hindi nagparamdam sa akin. Mas lalong nagpapainis sa akin ay ang kaalamang hindi lang basta bastang babae ang kayakap niya kundi si Amira.

Amira Grace Lergen.

The first woman he fall in love with.

First woman he courted.

First woman in her life that he shows love and concern.

The woman he wait for years, even he knows he has no assurance.

And most of all....

The first woman that made him experience heartbreak.

Kaya kahit sino naman siguro ay nakakaramdam ng insecure. Lalo na at sabi nila first love never dies. What if may gusto nga siya sa akin pero its nothing compared to what he felt towards Amira. Na kaya lang siya nagsettle sa akin dahil sa sobrang sakit na idinulot sa kaniya ni Amira kaya hindi niya na kayang bumalik pa kahit gustuhin niya man.

Because sometimes, no matter how much we want to stay and be with the person we love. If the glass of trust were broken, we can't force ourselves to love like we did before.

Heartbreaks makes us change and makes us question love.

"Ikaw? Bakit ka nandito?" tumayo ako at nagsimulang hagilapin ang mga awards na nakuha ko. "You should have stayed there longer, to cope up with the time you lost." matabang na sabi ko.

"What the hell you are talking about?"

Huli kong nakuha ay ang best in talent awards namin. I carry it in one hand and raised my head to face him. Halos magsalubong ang kilay niya ng sinundan ng tingin ang award ko partikular na sa best in talent.

His jaw moved as he fixed his gaze to me. His eyes darkened.

I gave him a sarcastic smile.

"You know what Asyo? Buti at natauhan ka na. Kasi pagod na rin akong pagtabuyan ka. Hindi ako kasing sama ni Amira na paghintayin ka ng taon. I can turn you down, not that its hard to do"

"The fuck! What is this again?"

"Thank you for all those good things you did to me while courting me, and to those concern and cares eventhough I know that its not true-"

"Why are you like this?" frustrated na sabi niya, mas lalong dumilim ang mukha.

I ignored him and continue. Masyado na kong nilalamon ng emosyon, to the point na hindi ko na naman ma control ang lumalabas sa bibig ko.

"Don't worry kasi kung inaalala mo na baka nahulog na ko sayo ay nagkakamali ka. I never love you from the first place. Congrats at mukhang naabot mo ang matagal mo ng pangarap- ang matamis na oo ni Amira. Using me is very effective, your plan goes to what you foresee it to happen, you make her jealous and now she realize her true feelings. Kaya lang hindi ako nahulog tulad ng plano mo.."

Nanginig ang kamay ko na kahawak sa award ko, nangatal rin ang labi ko pero ayokong makita niya ang kung ano talaga ang nararamdaman ko.

"Your are planning to hit two birds using one stone. Ang mapasagot si Amira at ang makita akong hulog na hulog sa iyo at masaktan sa inyo. I'm sorry but you failed on that part."

"Damn! You really knows how to crash my heart. Why does your words always sting?"

He tried to close our distance but I motioned my hand to stop him.