𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐘

porangi

porangi
/ˈpɔːraŋi/
adjective: porangi
mad; crazy.
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Glendale, AZ
February 25th 2015
third person perspective

"Hello Soraya." Soraya cowered back in hopes to shield herself from the frightening nurse, "don't be afraid, i'm here to help you sweetie." Her 'comforting' words didn't coax Soraya too well.

"D-don't hurt me, please don't hurt me." Soraya whimpered as the nurse began squeezing her fresh cuts.

"You've already done that for me, Soraya. Why are you cutting yourself, sweetie? And mommy's told me you've been starving yourself no matter how much she tries to get you to eat."

"I-I haven't been starving myself."

"Well, your ribs poking out tell another story sweetie." Soraya's eyes dropped down to her stomach and the nurse was in fact correct, "how long have you been starving yourself for, sweetie?"

"I don't starve myself, I haven't been starving myself."

"I can physically see with my own two eyes that's not true sweetie, so let's not lie now dear." Tears threatened to fall from Soraya's eyes.

"I'm not lying I swear, I don't starve myself I haven't ever starved myself before. I-I eat everything I'm given, mommy even tells me sometimes I overeat."

"Why are you lying, Soraya? You don't have to lie to me, it is unnecessary especially when I'm just trying to help you Soraya."

"I'm not lying!" Soraya yelled.

"Why are you getting angry, Soraya? I'm calmly talking to you in a neutral tone but yet you're screaming at me. For what?" Soraya squeezed her eyes shut hoping this was all just some sick twisted dream.

"I want to go home please."

"Do you think you can be home? Do you think you deserve to be at home? I don't think you're stable enough to be home, Soraya. You're starving yourself, scarring yourself and more. You aren't safe to yourself or your surroundings." Soraya's bottom lip quivered, "and mommy tells me your constantly yelling at her and screaming at your older brother."

"And after what we all witnessed yesterday I believe her." Tears began to roll down Soraya's cheeks at an immense speed.

"I-I never yell."

"Oh really, but you just yelled at me Soraya? You lie a lot."

"I don't yell at mommy, n-never i've never yelled at mommy."

because mommy beats me into to a pulp whenever i raise my voice even the slightest

"A-and I don't hit Trent, ever at all. I haven't ever done that either, I've never done any of the things you're accusing me of. I don't hit my big brother."

"Well that's quite hard to believe Soraya."

"W-why don't you believe me? I'm telling the truth, I don't hit Trenton o-or yell at mommy! Never!"

"You're yelling again Soraya, if you continue to yell at me I'll just leave. I refuse to speak to you nicely whilst you scream and yell at me."

"I-I'm not yelling."

"You definitely are Soraya, is someone making you yell? Is someone telling you you're not yelling?" Soraya furrowed her eyebrows.

"N-no one's telling me anything," Soraya squeezed her eyes shut, "it-it's just you."

"Am I inside your head, Soraya? Is my voice bouncing off of the walls? Can you see me when you close your eyes?" The fast pace at which the nurse was talking at was hurting Soraya's head and giving her a painful headache.

"Please stop." Soraya whimpered.

"Who are you telling to stop, Soraya? Me or the voices? I'm not doing anything, i'm just trying to help you. We can put a stop to the voice Soraya, just tell me the truth."

"There's no voices, it's just you!" Soraya exclaimed clutching her head.

"Now you're holding your head Soraya, I know you're hearing voices. Tell the truth Soraya, be a good girl. If you're a good girl, I'll let you go home."

"R-really?" Soraya stuttered believing the nurse's lies.

"Yup, just tell me the truth."

"There's no voices, I swear. That's the truth, can I go home now?" Soraya asked expectedly.

"That's not really the truth though Soraya, you have to stay here till you tell us the truth. I'm trying to help you, but you keep lying Soraya."

"I-I'm not lying."

"Are you saying i'm bad at my job, Soraya? I've worked here for twenty plus years I'm pretty sure I can identify when some sixteen year old is lying straight to me face."

"I-i'm not lying though, I-I just want to go home please." Soraya begged, "i'll do anything please."

"All I'm asking for is the truth Soraya, then you get to go home but you refuse to tell me that one simple thing."

"I-I don't understand, I've told you the truth. I'm not hearing voices." The nurse sighed getting fed up, deciding she could just edit the CCTV making it look like she did.

With all the evidence of Soraya yelling unprovoked, her stomach, scars, and behaviour yesterday the nurse was hoping they could get Soraya in the hospital for at least six months.

"W-wait where are you going! Can I leave, please! please take me home, please let me go home!" Soraya begged her to stay.

"You aren't going anywhere till you tell the truth." The nurse tried manipulating the small girl into lying but it failed, so she had to work with what she got. Which wasn't much but it was enough, for her.

"No, no! Please, don't leave me here! Please! Let me go home!" Soraya screamed to the top of her lungs, "please let me go home! I'm begging you please!"

"Mama! Mama! Trenton! Mama! Please! Don't leave me here! Mama, please!" Her voice croaked as her chest heaved and she struggled to breathe, "mama." She whispered her voice croaky, "mama." she repeated.

"I'll behave mama." She whispered quietly, "i'll be so good mama."

"Mama please." she repeated as hot tears raced down her cheeks.

"Trenton, come get me please. I'll behave. I'll be good." Her voice wavered off as she spoke to no-one.

The nurse grinned watching the cameras hidden in her room, this this evidence was awardable.

"Mama." The tears scorched down her cheeks, "I'll behave." Her voice halted as she searched for air to inhale feeling like life was closing in on her.

Her eyes fluttered shut as she decided not to fight against the darkness for once, accepting it.

Welcoming it.