Random x Male Reader

Dean Winchester | Final Ride

15x20 spoilers (but we still pretend that never happened)

did i hear double update for Dean's 42th birthday? i think tf yes

Heaven got made over.
God is gone and the new one, Jack's in charge now. It just... somehow happened. You didn't knew who Jack was or how all of it went down, all you knew was that this was so much better.

You were in the Roadhouse, when he came. You couldn't believe it. Dean in heaven.
Of course he would be in heaven, but even with the little feeling for time you had up here, it felt a bit early. Too early.
Nervously you were sipping on your glass of whiskey, listening to Dean's and Bobby's conversation through the busted window.

"I think I'll go for a drive ", you heard Dean say eventually, the smile in his voice audible.

Your heart dropped. It made sense. It's what he deserved.
Still. Wouldn't he want to see you first? Bobby hadn't even mentioned you. Neither had Dean.
How long has it been since Dean lost you on earth? Was he even still thinking about you? What if he had gotten over you, what if you didn't matter anymore? Of course, you'd wanted him to be happy down on earth, maybe find someone else, but... still.

Anxiously you downed the rest of the glass, just to have it immediately filled up again.
With a racing heart you tried to decide whether to go outside and show yourself, or give Dean the ride he so dearly deserved first.

"You might wanna check inside first", you heard Bobby say.
If even possible, you felt your heart start to pound even harder, but you also couldn't help exhaling in relief.

Dean's crunchy steps on the gravel in front of the Roadhouse stopped. Another crunch meant he'd turned around.
It's been so long and yet you still could perfectly imagine his confused features.

Another moment of silence, then, "just go inside, ya idjit."

Should you stand up? Greet him?
Time works differently up here, still, you'd missed him so damn much.
You wished you knew why he was here. You'd know how to act instead of being so anxious. This was heaven for fucks sake, shouldn't this be a place of peace? Instead you were almost more nervous than down on earth.

He opened the door and stepped into the gloomy lighting, probably scanning the room.
Dean didn't say anything, but you couldn't bear the silence anymore so you slowly turned around and tried for a smile, that probably looked like a miserable attempt at one.

He looked a bit older than you remembered him, but not much. Didn't look bad though, quite the opposite, mind you.
You felt your mouth go dry, making it hard for you to swallow.

Anxiously you observed him, but he didn't move at all. Looked like he was screwed into the floor just where he stood. Only at a second glance you noticed the shine in his eyes - he wasn't tearing up was he?
Dean aggressively bit on his bottom lip, trying to keep himself from showing too much emotion.

"Hey Dean", you tried for a light greeting, but it came out all wrong and scratchy.
He flexed his hands into a fist, his nostrils flaring, jaw clenching.

Then suddenly, without any warning, he charged over to you. Your chair scratched loudly over the floor, almost tipping over as you stood up way too quickly to welcome him into your arms.
Dean crashed into you, fisting his hands into your shirt just underneath the back of your neck and pulled you closer and closer, pulled you close to his chest with a crushing force. He let out a wet laughter, that turned into a sob pretty quickly.

"I missed y-"

"I know, Dean", you interrupted him. You didn't want him to live through all that grief again. Not right now. 
"Me too. It's okay, you're here now." Tightening your grip as well you tried your best to calm him, "You're here now."

You felt him swallow heavily, trying to choke down the tears.

Gently you tried to remove yourself from his tight grip, but he was tugging you even closer, fists still clenched into your shirt.
After you've given him some more time, you tried again. But his hands just slipped from your back to your cheeks, clutching to them as if he could lose you again.

Shooting him a watery grin, you tried to soothe him, "You're stuck with me forever now. Ain't getting rid of me anymore."

Another wet chuckle, but his grip was less tight. Some tension visibly went out of his frame. Maybe the fact that he was in heaven with you now, finally started to settle in.

Gently you slipped your hand to the back of his neck and pushed your foreheads together. With an aching heart you noticed his lip trembling, his effort to surpress any more choked sobs.

For just a moment you let yourself close your eyes as well, just basking in his smell and warmth. You had missed this - him - the most up here.
Then you forced yourself to open your eyes again, staring at his emerald green ones, though his gaze kept flickering all over the place, trying to take you in all at once. It felt almost hungry, the way he looked like he was starved from seeing you, being able to touch you, be with you.

"Let's go for that ride, huh?"

Dean dropped his head and couldn't help another wet chuckle. Then he nodded, sucked in a deep breath and -

"Driver picks the music - -"

"I know, I know", you grinned softly and leaned up to brush your lips against his, "shotgun shuts his cake hole."