Red Velvet 6th Member

Deserve Better

Vivian's POV

Ever since I came out to Sana, she's been worrying about me. I don't know why, but she is. She doesn't need to.

She's the first person outside of my family and VERY close group of friends to know.

I looked down at my hands, looking at my small and depressing reflection in my wedding band. He's not coming back. Why would he?

He's probably happier now that he's free of me. He can be happy, and not be burdened by myself. But it's a dick move he hasn't tried to spend any time with Aera.

I slid off my wedding band and placed in the ash tray on my living room coffee table. I rubbed my now bare finger, feeling sad but free at the same time.

My phone suddenly starts ringing, and I reach to see who it is. It's Seulgi.

"Hi..." I answer in a small and weak sounding voice.

"Vivian? Are you okay?" Seulgi asked, sounding concerned.

"Yeah, why?" I put the phone on speaker and placed it on the table in front of me.

"You haven't checked the news?" She sounded sad.

"What happened?" I started feeling worried.

"Jongin was seen out with a new girl."

With that, my heart dropped. It hasn't been that long, and he's moved on.

"Vivian?"

I don't speak. Too shocked to say anything.

"Are you there?" Seulgi tried to get me to speak.

I hung up and threw my phone onto the couch. I curled up into a ball and started crying my eyes out. I sat like that for 5 minutes until I gathered myself together.

As I started to walk away from my phone, it started to ring. I checked the ID and all I saw was Jo.

I immediately answered and assumed who it was.

"Don't fucking talk to me, you complete and utterly asshat!" I yelled at the person on the other end.

"Woah, Viv calm down. What's wrong?" The person responded and I immediately felt bad for freaking out.

"Sorry Josh, I thought you were my husband." I rubbed my temple.

"Your husband's an asshat?" He half chuckled.

"Yeah. I mean, he's legally my husband, but we aren't together right now." I explained. I hadn't told Josh that Jongin and I separated.

"Oh, Vivian... I'm so sorry."

"Meh, it's fine. I'm okay, well I'm better than I was a few weeks ago." I half-lied. I'm not okay, but I'm getting better everyday.

"And you're just telling me now?" He sounded surprised and shocked. He then turned on his camera, showing me his slightly disappointed and sadden face, with his new vibrant purple hair.

"Well, you've been working on your music and prepping for everything. So I don't want to distract you." I turned on my camera too.

"Vivian, you've been working hard on your music too. You know I'm here for you. I may not have known you for as long as your other friends, but that doesn't mean I don't care about you or want to be there for you." He looked straight into the camera, and it felt like he was looking straight into my soul.

"I know, but I'm not weak. I know that I can handle it." I fake half smiled.

"That's not the point. Just because you can doesn't mean that you should. You deserve to be happy, and since you're on the other side of the world and I can't give you a giant ass hug right now, I'm trying my best to speak clearly. I know what it's like to lose the one you love. But if it's really meant to be, he'll come back. And if he doesn't than he missed out on one of the greatest people ever." He smiled sincerely.

I started to tear up, and his words made me genuinely smile. Something I hadn't done in a while.

"Really?" I sniffled.

"Really. I mean, look at me and Amanda. We broke up and now we're together and stronger than ever." His eyes lit up when he mentioned his wife. The way he talks about her proves he genuinely loves her.

"But you too are like, meant to be. You're soulmates or whatever other word you want to use. I thought Jongin was mine, but maybe just because you found someone, doesn't mean that they're the one." I looked down at my feet.

"Sometimes the one you want is not the one you need." Josh quoted himself.

"Did you seriously just quote your own song at me?" I chuckled.

"Maybe..." He smiled back at me.

"That song has been playing nonstop. It's been my anthem during this entire shit show." I smiled half-heartedly.

"It's true though. Don't worry if he really loves you or not. If he does, he'll be back. He'll come back. I know it." Josh sincerely said.

"And if he doesn't?" I look at my wedding ring in the tray.

"Then you deserve better."