Spencer Reid's Daughter

Part 34

When you finished having a panic attack in the bathroom of the BAU, you walked out to see Hotch standing by the elevator. You walked closer and he asked, "Are you ready to go?" You answered nervously, "Yeah." He could tell something was off but he didn't want to bring it up. When you got to his car, you sat in the passenger seat and began to fidget with your hands. This was a dead giveaway you were nervous. As he was driving, he asked, "Why are you nervous?" You answered with a confused face, "I'm not nervous-" He motioned towards your fidgeting hands and bouncing leg, "y/n, you always fidget with your hands and bounce your leg when you're nervous." You stopped as you said offendedly, "I do not!" He chuckled, "It's not your fault, you and your dad have the same habits when you're nervous." You looked at him confused, "We do?" He nodded, "Yes! You two also furrow your brows when you get angry and put up a wall when you're overwhelmed. You two are practically the same person!" You nodded, this was the first time you realized that. You eventually arrived at the psychiatrist's office. You both walked in and he signed you in, then you sat in the waiting room. You observed the room and counted things like the number of chairs or how many files you could see, things to distract you. Who is the Doctor? Why did I agree to this. I didn't have a choice. Wait, is it illegal to require someone to go to therapy for a job that you don't even have yet. Can't I just walk out- "y/n Reid for Dr. Melrose." Your thoughts were interrupted by a nurse. You stood up, "Yep!" You followed the nurse but looked back at Hotch one more time for reassurance. He smiled and nodded and you followed the nurse down a long hallway. Eventually, you got to a room labeled, 'Dr. Melrose, PTSD Psychiatrist.' You walked in and were greeted by a tall, slender man, probably mid-30s, "Dr. Melrose." He reached out to shake your hand but you said, "I don't shake." He nodded and sat back down, the nurse walked out of the room and you sat on the couch by his desk. He began by saying, "Okay y/n, I know you have gone through these before but I still have to make sure you know the legal stuff so-" You interrupted him, "You are not legally allowed to greet me in public unless I greet you first. Everything I say in here is confidential unless I am being hurt, hurting someone, or hurting myself, which I am but literally everyone knows that. Anything else?" He looked at you confused for a moment, "Umm, I think you got it all. So, y/n, tell me why you're here." You threw your back on the couch so that you were laying down, "Honestly, I have no idea because this didn't work the last three times I did therapy." He nodded, "Well, just tell me why you think you're here." You sat up and looked him dead in the eye, "Hotch didn't tell you anything? I thought you both knew each other." He responded, "We do, and he did tell me. But, I don't want it told to me in his perspective, I want to know your side because it does no good if I am trying to help with just outsider knowledge." Your other therapists didn't do that. You laid back down, "Oh, okay. Well, umm, I guess I will just start from the beginning." He began to write as you spoke, "When I was four, my mom died of cancer and my dad was emotionally unavailable for a few months after that. Then, when I was 12, I was kidnapped by Peter Hankel, the brother of the person who kidnapped my dad. I was beaten and tortured for days until my dad's team found me. Umm, I went and am still in a major depressive disorder. It caused me to self harm using a blade, my dad took them away about a month ago so I have been doing a bit better. Umm, I was then held hostage by Peter Hankel's brother, Mark Hankel. I was hit in the head with the gun and had a severe brain bleed from that. I have been having nightmares about that a lot lately. My grandma is a narcissistic bitch who slaps people. Oh yeah, and my dad is a recovering drug addict. Shit, I wasn't supposed to say that." He raised his eyebrows and looked at you a bit shocked, "Well, this is going to take more than three sessions." You both chuckled a bit and he said, "Well, what do you want to get taken care of today? Do you want to get rid of the nightmares or help with the depressive episodes, etc." You thought for a moment, "Can we do the nightmares, I need to catch up on sleep." He asked, "Have they been so bad that you can't sleep?" You nodded, "Yeah, sometimes, I can't close my eyes without seeing the Hankel brothers, feeling them beat me." He began, "Okay, I know this is going to sound scary, but I need you to imagine the nightmares. Play every detail in your head, start in a safe place and end when you're in a safe place. Then, when you are done, I want you to play it backwards until you are in that safe place again."

He did various exercises with you that you actually believed might work, then, he said, "Okay, I'm going to talk with Hotch real quick, he will meet you in the lobby. This was a great session and I hope to see you back next week." You smiled, "I hope so too." You walked back into the lobby and sent Hotch to meet with Dr. Melrose. About five minutes, he came back and said, "Okay, are you ready?" You nodded and headed out to his car. When you got in he asked, "How was it?" You answered, "Honestly, he was way better than my other therapists." He smiled and said, "I'm glad. Dr. Melrose is a great guy." He began to drive to your house but when you got in the neighborhood, he got a text from Penelope. He asked, "Hey y/n, could you read that for me?" You picked up his phone and read it, "We've got a case." He said, "I'll drop you off at your house, your dad can decide if he wants you to go." You nodded and got out of the car, "Bye!" He waved bye and you ran quickly in the house knowing your dad would be in a rush. He said, "y/n, we have a case, I want you to stay with Penelope this time." You responded from the other room, "Why?" He answered, "Because I said so!" You let out a sigh and got your stuff ready to go to Penelope's. When you finished getting your stuff together, you went downstairs to see your dad ready to go. He said, "Okay, I let Penelope know you are coming over. Are you ready?" You sighed, mad because you didn't get to go, "I guess." He said sympathetically, "I'm sorry y/n, I just think you need a break from all the blood and crime stuff. I just want you to get better." You just looked down as you walked out and he said, "Do you want to talk about therapy after I get back?" You got in the car and said, "There's nothing to talk about." He began to drive to Penelope's and said, "I just want to know how it-" You interrupted him annoyed, "It went fine." He raised his eyebrows and said, "I don't want to argue before I go." You just rolled your eyes, he was always so nosy. Once you got to Penelope's apartment, you got out of the car and your dad got out as well. He handed you your bag and gave you a hug, he whispered, "I love you y/n, I'll see you in a bit." You didn't say anything, you just walked to the door. Your dad watched you walk in and then he drove away. You were welcomed by Penelope saying, "Hey sweet girl! Are you ready to go to the office with me?" You nodded and put your stuff down and then walked to her car. When you got there, she said, "Do you want to grab dinner on the way?" You nodded and she went to McDonalds and then went to the office. Once you got there, she briefed everyone who was on the plane, you just sat there and read a book. You glanced at the clock and it read 10:00PM. You looked up at Penelope and she said, "I know, we might be here a bit longer than suspected but I brought you a blanket and a pillow, I'm sure Rossi wouldn't mind you sleeping on his couch." You grabbed the blanket and pillow and said, "Thanks." You went to Rossi's office and practically passed out on his couch. You were eventually woken up by Penelope whispering, "y/n, I'm finished with work for the night, we can go back to my place now." You rubbed your eyes and yawned, you looked at the clock, it was 1:30AM. You sat up and half-awake, followed her out of the building. You asked, "How is the case going?" She answered, "We almost have a good, running profile." You yawned, "That's good." You got in her yellow beetle car and closed your eyes, you were too tired. When you got back to her apartment, you fell asleep on her couch, you couldn't even make it to the spare bedroom.