|| Heartbeat~♡ || ▪BNHA▪

Hiraeth

Last chapter was kinda short so here's an extra something something for y'all <3

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"Yuki~"

I used to love that voice when it called out to me. I would reach out and go towards that loving voice, such a gentle voice. A voice that calmed me down when I was in shambles, a voice that I knew I could trust, it was everything to me.

It gave me comfort, it made me learn how to love. It taught me the ways of living in this world. It made me felt like I could do anything, as long as that voice was there for me.

It gave me hope. It was my hero, my mentor.

So, what went wrong?

When did it all come crashing down? It seemingly came with no warning. The day where I longed for that loving voice to return, my hand reached out, calling for help. It thirsted for only one thing, affection. I thought I could still receive that endearment, but I was naive at the time.

I continued to reach, it was taking longer than I thought.

Reaching and reaching.

Finally, when the time came, I clutched onto it. The love I thought I deserved, I squeezed onto it, I didn't want to let go. The day I waited for ages had finally come. Where I could feel that warm sensation once again that was love.

.

.

.

Cold.

It was cold.

Where was the warmth?

No. Was there any warmth to begin with?

Her hands were numb, realization dawn upon her. She tried to warm up her hands, rubbing them together. Nothing work. It was still so cold.

Stone cold.

Was her hands always this cold?

She breathed out, smoke forming from the cold air around her. She laughed, a chuckle came out. It sounded forced.

The love that she thought she was holding on vanished, now in her palm was emptiness. She tried to grab onto something, anything. But all her tiny hands could grab was air.

It felt like an endless fall. She wondered when she would hit rock bottom. Being in an endless cycle of falling again and again hurt. It stung, so much.

She wanted to end it.

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Warmth.

She didn't understand how it felt anymore, how it felt to be warm. She laughed, once again. The warmth she felt all this time, the warmth that was her everything, that voice.

Perhaps it was just all a hoax.

Warmth was never a feeling, it was a hallucination, a delusion. Warmth was never there for her, she wasn't meant to be warm. The warmth she felt, was a rapid fire burning her. Now just extinguished.

The love and affection it brought along disappear, nothing changed. The fire that was burning now merely replace with poison. A poison that was killing her so slowly, so slow that she wanted to speed it up.

She was tired of it, this poison eating her inside out. She didn't want an antidote, no, an antidote was futile. It would just make it stop, but the damage was already beyond repair.

She wanted an escape.

The voice, that was filled with love, was now suffocating to hear. That voice was torturing her. She wanted it gone. She now wished for no warmth, that was simply luxurious for her. Now what she wanted was simple and direct.

To end that endless fall.

.
.
.

"Are you okay?"

Another voice.

In the swarm of cold voices, she sensed another voice. It felt so different, it wasn't cold nor warm. There was no...temperature in that voice. Such a neutral voice.

She liked it.

The voice that was seething with poison was still killing her. But now came a new voice, it wasn't an antidote, no, it did more than cure her.

That voice was repairing her.

Who knew her broken heart could be fixed? She thought she was a hopeless soul. She didn't realize it sooner, maybe because there wasn't a voice there for her. But now it was different.

In that dark endless void, a light came into view. This time, it wasn't a hand reaching out. It was something entirely different.

It was a ladder.

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She could still feel the cold, and there was still no warmth. She abandoned that desire a long time ago, she no longer needed it. To her, all of that was merely a waste of time. It wasn't what she needed.

But what she wanted.

Instead, she now was gifted a power to fight the sheer cold. That voice saved her, it gifted her a will.

A will to fight the darkness.

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Hiraeth is such a pretty word <3, I wanted to use it for the longest time i- djnsksn