Realizations

Chapter 2

Bellas P.O.V

It's been 2 weeks now that I've had the feeling things are going to change. I've been observing the family more and more lately. Everyone's relationship seems different than mine and edwards. Although Jasper and Alice's relationship also seems different than the others, but in a different way.

They still take eachothers opinions and wants into consideration, they just don't seem as "in love" as the others.

I really want to talk to someone and ask exactly what being mated feels like, I just don't know who to ask.

Rosalie appreciated me going to save edward and said thank you, but I can tell she still doesn't truly like me. My silly brother bear Emmett is just honestly to immature.

Edward won't tell me, although I'm not exactly sure why. I thought he'd be happy to tell me, to prove that I am his mate and the woman he wants forever.

I don't think Alice will tell me because Edward won't like it. I swear sometimes I think those two are hiding things on purpose. They have their own private conversations and go hunting together by themselves alot.

Jasper would probably tell me, if I could get close to him without everyone else around. I feel a need to be near him and get to know him but I don't get a chance. For some reason I think edward and Alice are keeping us apart on purpose.

The only Cullen I have a feeling will be honest with me is Carlisle.  The question is how am I going to get the chance to speak to him privately. I could fake an injury and go to the hospital, but most likely be accompanied by Edward.

At least Alice won't be able to see my decision to talk to Carlisle. Ever since we came back from Volterra she has not been able to see my future. It started out as blurriness and then went to complete blackness. Meaning she can't see me at all. I'm actually very happy about it.

"Love are you ok? You've been staring out the window blankly for awhile now?"edward asked. Apparently finally getting my attention.

"Uh?.......I mean yea. I'm fine. I was just thinking."

"What about?" Asks Alice.

"Everything. Graduation is only weeks away and I guess it's now just hitting me." I lied. They both nod their heads and go into one of their annoying silent conversations. I think they bought my lie, which surprises me because I am a horrible liar. I know one person doesn't believe my lie, Jasper. I can feel his gaze on me, but I refuse to look at him, no matter how much I want too.

The cafeteria is alot noisier today than usual. Mostly because they chose the valedictorian this morning. Who is the valedictorian, You ask? It's Jessica Stanley. Insane right, you'd think because she's the school gossip queen and acts like a dumb blonde that she's stupid. Apparently she is far from it. I'm happy for her, im just still a little shocked. I thought for sure it would be Angela or Eric Yorkie, they are both incredibly smart.

The sound of the bell signaling lunch to be over brought me out of my head. Gathering my backpack off the floor I look up to see edward already standing waiting for me. He used to hold out his hand and help me up, but now he never does. We walk to biology in silence. I really did not know what to say to him, so I decided to just say nothing.

The rest of the day seemed to drag on slowly. I still had no idea how I was going to sneak away to see Carlisle, and it is just frustrating.

Walking out of the gym I see edward waiting for me, as usual. The walk to the parking lot is filled with silence, until finally he spoke.

"Love Alice and I are going hunting. We aren't going far. Do you want to come to the house, or go home? I can have Emmett come to your house until we return."