Sinners Are Winners [bxb]

Chapter Fifteen

CHAPTER FIFTEEN- I Said No Prostitutes, Xavion

"Oh, yeah? What would ya do with me?" the woman asks in a silky voice. I couldn't say she wasn't attractive, but her make-up was distracting me. Her lipstick was as smeared as her soul.

I glanced over at Xavion, who was watching. He raised an eyebrow at me in a 'don't look at me, look at her' sort of way.

I shot my eyes back to her and awkwardly coughed. "Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?"

Xavion sighed and face planted his head into his palm. "For the last time, Itchymael. Pick up lines and dirty talk are not the same thing." He spun his hand around. "Let's try that again."

The woman adjusted her boob holster before leaning forward. She gave me a sinful smirk and tilted her head. As she did so, her tongue ran over her teeth. "Wanna take this to the bedroom, big boy?"

My mouth flopped open. "I don't have a bedroom."

Xavion shot me a glare.

I quickly attempted to backpedal. "--But... I do have a couch I frequent. It's comfy."

Xavion facepalmed again. Damn-- this wasn't going well.

I awkwardly pointed to the couch behind me. "There it is. Would you like to sinfully and primarily fornicate on it?"

The woman's lips pursed before she turned to Xavion. "I really don't think you're paying me enough for this."

"Come ooon, Jessica." Xavion said in a begging voice. He reached over and clasped his hand over hers. "He obviously needs to start somewhere and Grant put a child lock on all the porn websites. Plus, I'm paying you decently."

She sighed. "Throw in another two grams and I'll do it."

Xavion grinned. "Deal!" He threw his arms at me. "Now please, proceed."

I puffed my cheeks out. "Is this even a sin? There's no lust between us."

"Speak for yourself." Xavion winked. "I'm constantly feeling enough lust for the both of ya."

Xavion's woman friend, Jessica, chuckled. "If only we could convert all that sexual energy into something useful. We could probably power the entire Earth for a century or so."

"Hey," Xavion waved his hand. "Less making fun of me, more flirting."

Jessica snorted but turned her attention back to me. She gave me a small smile. "Wanna go back to my place?"

I pondered all the possible responses that Xavion had briefed me with. I did my best to smirk, "Okie-dokie."

"Okie-dokie?" Xavion asked, sounding exasperated. "Seriously? I didn't even know you knew that word. You really had to choose the worst moment to bust it out?"

"You said it was good for light-hearted and amusing affirmation! I was affirming lightheartedly!" I defended myself.

Xavion rolled his eyes. "You're banned from saying okie-dokie until you have a true understanding on how to use it." He sighed. "At this rate, you'll be a virgin forever."

"There's nothing wrong with that." I scoffed.

Jessica whistled. "Preach, brother!" She put her hand in the hair.

I nearly flinched back, but then I remember that this was one of those "high-fives" that Grant had prepared me for. I met our hands together in a cooperative clap, though I wasn't sure why.

Xavion smacked our hands away from each other. "Stop bonding over boring conversation and start bonding over flirting."

"Alright, alright." Jessica pulled her hand back to rub the pain away. "You still haven't explained why you're paying me to do this."