chapter 30

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Getting out of the dark toilet stall while wiping his tears harshly with the back of his palm, standing infront of the mirror, he looked at himself and the only thing he felt was disgust..
His hair was dishelved flying in all directions, his face was flustered due to crying, eyes were swollen and red.. opening the water tap which made a screech noise he splashed some water on his face..then again looking at himself slapping his face a few times, and practicing to make his fake smile look as real as possible and hiding the sadness under his fake charisma..
Drying his face with a paper towel jungkook close the hospital bathroom's door with a thud to which he only recieved stares from some nurses who were running an errand or few patients who were wandering around like a cloud in a clear sky..
Apologizing quickly he walked outside the building.. in these past few hours the hospital garden has become one of his favourite place..
Getting spaced out and staring at nothing.. sometimes patients who were just walking around with their family slash friends gave him uncomfortable or weird look because it felt like he was constantly staring at them.. making them feel creeped out..
Walking on the dried leaves and decoying branches he found himself a vacant seat under a big peepal tree..
He was staring at zero space..
Under the shade of the peepal tree he was subconsciously looking at the sunlight so intensely that he could actually see the light waves....
It's been forty-eight hours since taehyung has lost his consciousness and jungkook is sleep deprived.. everyone says the same thing 'hes gonna be okay'  but deep inside everyone knows that they are losing there hopes.. and are just trying hard to keep the nonchalance up with smiles and laughs.. jungkook knows taehyung has no chance to live but yet he wants to give himself hope that he'll live.. only a miracle can save him but..... Miracles never happens. He has never believed in those kind of superstitions.. ofcourse he bowed before god but that doesn't mean he believes them...
The launch date is near and he isn't taking any risks there..
He's mostly in the office and dosen't waste his time here in the hospital, praying for taehyung to come back alive.. he hasn't looked at taehyung since the past two days...
He would rather make taehyung proud by making the biggest project of his life successful..
The others are busy with the cops and dani is under serious negotiation..
Even the lawyers cannot save them from a prison of a nice ten years but they are just fighting the case for satisfaction..
Human emotions was never something jungkook got a catch of..
In his school he was known as one of the meanest kid for saying truth on the face.. but instead he got bullied.. isn't saying the truth a good thing? Then why was he getting bullied for saying things that were true?
He was intellectual.. in his school he got this name as 'the god of physics' but his physical confrontation was less than useless to even try to stand up for himself..
He always thought about what is the actual point of being the centre of attention he would rather be a tree in a drama than the main character being laughed at..
But when puberty slapped him on the face, some new emotions punched too..lust, jealousy, frustration and love, not wanting to feel those emotions he just closed himself in his room suffocated by his thoughts..
But taehyung literally snatched him out of his fake facade.. cracking his shell and breaking all of his boundaries.. Kim taehyung has understood Jeon jungkook like no one else has did..
Slowly coming out of his shell he understood that the world is totally different from what he thinks it is..a
place that is so pure, so dirty and raw..
Taehyung made the war zone their paradise.. made his enemies his allies,
Both of them saw the pain and the pleasure together.. Taehyung was the place where jungkook could feel his tears in the whole numb world, a place where he could lose all his fears, and he could be reckless...
Without knowing a tear slipped out of his eyes again...
God how will he live now?
Covering his face with his hands to not show the world his tears, how coward he is! So weak hearted he is!
Standing up, turning his heels back to where the main gate was to just get out of this place where taehyung calls him..
He dosen't wanna get attached to him, not anymore.. because now if something happens to him he won't be able to live.. he needs to get distant from the man.. yes he was being a coward at the daylight, fooling himself but when the dark clouds cover the whole sky it was jungkook who sat outside of taehyung's cabin just feeling his fading aura.. and he left before the sunrise... But he never looked at the man who was in deep slumber..
No matter how much his inner mind insisted him to just take a glance of his boyfriend, of the man that he calls his but no.. jungkook is stubborn too... No matter how much he regrets it.. he won't look at taehyung unless his eyes are open and  he is smiling at him while gesturing him to just run into his arms and hug him...
He was about to sit In the car when a voice stopped him... He looked back to see hoseok waving at him.. he looked towards him and smiled at him..
Gasping for breath hoseok crouched down.. laughing Jungkook helped him stand up.. "c'mon Buddy! Let's get  coffee together..." Jungkook just nodded hesitantly, instantly knowing the exact reason of their sudden outing.... They arrived at a cafe near by ordering their own preferences they sat down near a window....
A few minutes of silence was there until hoseok decided to say..
"How are you doing?" He looked up..
Smiling he said.. "perfectly fine hyung.." hoseok sighed... "Why? Why do you bottle things up? You need to open up Jeon jungkook-ahh" "hyung I don't know what are you talking about? I'm perfectly fine.." jungkook said in a calm tone.. hoseok inhaled clearly stabilizing his inner annoyance.. " Jungkook you know we can help you right? But if you don't say anything--" "hyung.. hyung I'm perfectly fin--" "You are not fine Jeon jungkook!" He slammed his hands on the table gaining the attention of the few people who were entertaining themselves at the cafe... A waitress who had their drinks came and asked them not to make a commotion in the cafe..but was brutally Ignored by a glaring hoseok and A very calm jungkook sipping his milkshake..
At last hoseok sat down in his seat while sighing.. "then tell me.. why haven't you met taehyung since the accident? Who do you think you are lying? Jungkook please...just listen to what you are saying.." now jungkook's patience was running really thin.. he was trying to keep his calm because he didn't wanted to be harsh on hoseok.. " Jeon jungkook.. let's just go and meet taehyung.." hoseok said while standing up he touched jungkook's hand who just took it back and glared at hoseok.. "hyung please.." said jungkook backing away.."please..please just mind your own damn business.." with that said jungkook stormed out of the cafe leaving a aghasted hoseok who just sat on his seat with a thud..how did the things go this bad? Taehyung? And now jungkook? Tears were streaming down his cheeks non stop...
What has happened to their once happy family?...


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