bandage - n.jm

23.

The slow days passed and Friday finally came. Before Mark and Donghee would go to the city, she asked to go to the hospital first. Mark also had a similar reaction when being told the room number, but he kept his head high and brushed away the thoughts.

"Miss Nam," Donghee walked into the empty room, "this is Mark, he's about to take me to Star Crossed." She walked to the empty seat beside her bed, looking down at her.

"He looks better than the smurf, the boy looked like a street thug that does cocaine." Donghee let out a stifled laugh while Mark stood near the door with a loud wheeze.

"When you go in, her daughter works in the shop with her so make sure you mention me and they'll treat you fine. You also must say your name to her. Sooyoung is 50, and her daughter should be around your age, maybe a bit older." Jihyeon gently took ahold of Donghee's hand, holding it as tight as she could - which wasn't that tight.

"You must be careful from now on. They're watching, they always are."
"Who? Who's watching?" Mark steps forward, asking Jihyeon for the sake of Donghee.
"I can't say. What I can say is that the petal never falls and the moon will always shine. The moon will guide you home and lead you to treasure." Jihyeon brings Donghee's hand up to her face, leaving a small peck on the back of it.

While the two females interacted with each other, Mark wrote down what Jihyeon had said onto his phone, keeping it in his notes to look into later.

. . .

"Y'know Markus, I don't understand a single thing she said to me." Donghee turned to Mark. The both of them were 10 minutes away from the hospital, in the car and on their way to Star Crossed.

"Don't look at me, I don't know either. Also, what's the address again? Type it into the GPS for me yea?" She hummed in response. Donghee typed in the address before leaning back into her seat.

Her mind began to wander off elsewhere during the ride. She brought herself back to what Mark said to Jaemin a few days ago.

What did he do to Donghyuck after the incident? She had yet to find out. It had been on her mind recently and she couldn't stop thinking about it.

"Markus," he hummed in response to the call, "what did you do to Donghyuck, after Jaemin came and took care of me, what did you do?"

Even while driving, Mark tensed at the question. He shifted in the driver's seat, not wanting to turn to face her even at a red light.

He knew Donghee very well to know that if he answered, he'd hate her. Despite how much Donghyuck hated her, how much he despised her presence - she still cared for him. She wanted to be mad, she wanted to hate him - but she couldn't.

No matter how much he hurt her mentally, she couldn't help but look up to him as her older brother. She couldn't help but still worry for him. And Mark hated that about her. He hated that she still cared for Donghyuck despite the pain he knowingly puts her through.

"Donghee, y'know I can't answer that."
"Mark, did you..hurt him?" Her voice was quiet; afraid.
"Hee listen, he hurt you. He hurt you more than I can count on my hands and toes. It was a few punches and a lot of words, he can handle it."
"Mark we've talked about this-"
"Yes, yes we have! I don't regret the decision I made okay? I know what I did and he deserves it!"
"He's my brother!"
"And he hurts you! You might think it's okay because he doesn't hurt you physically, but it isn't okay! I care for you Donghee and I'm worried that I'm gonna lose you because I know how much it affects you, I know."

Donghee turned away from Mark, she didn't want to look at him with glassy eyes. She couldn't even count how many times this conversation had come up. She couldn't recall every conversation like this that they had. There were simply too many.

"Mark you can't hurt him. He's my brother and even if he does what he does, I don't want him hurt. I'm aware of the shit he does but guess what, I'm fine."

"No, no you're not. You're on the verge of crying as we speak, you think I don't know? You forget the amount of time I catch you crying because of him, the amount of times you call me because he said something to you. Why, why do you care so much?"

"Because he's my brother Mark, it's my job to care." Mark turned to look at Donghee at the red light, "But clearly he doesn't think it's his job to care for you. You shouldn't care for him when he doesn't care for you."

It hurt Mark a lot. Seeing her hurt and in pain over the stupid things her brother does to her, the stupid words that he can't control - it hurts.

Sometimes he wondered why Donghyuck was so different. He used to be sweet, caring, thoughtful - where did it all go wrong? From the very beginning that the siblings met again after years, he was cold and insensitive.

"But he-"
"No, I'm sick and tired of it Donghee. I'm sorry if I come off too strong but knock some sense into your head, will you? He's your brother but that doesn't mean you have to love him. Family isn't always the blood, you know that. You used to tell me that even. Stop running around and taking care of your brother when he can't even give a single shit about your fucking life. You deserve better than having that asshole kid as a brother."

But to what extent would she listen? No matter how many times she heard those words, she only listened up to a certain point. She didn't know her self worth the way Mark knew it.

She couldn't love herself the way Mark told her to. There was never a thought of self love in her mind. All nothing but degrading thoughts.

that..that sucked