the french trio || bts crack ff

thiefbrush

(A/N: an ode to my bestie: here's eric)

____________________

space boys

jimonchèrie: hey guys,,,

meep: are you okay??

jimonchèrie: no :(

milkytae: HUH

milkytae: BEST FRIEND WHAT'S WRONG

milkytae: IF IT'S ABOUT ME STEALING YOUR TOOTHBRUSH AGAIN, I ALREADY TOLD YOU I WAS SORRY THE FIRST TIME :((

jimonchèrie: no it's not that

jimonchèrie: WAIT WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU USED IT AGAIN????!!!

milkytae: nevermind bestie 🤗

damnjoon: what's up

jimonchèrie: my parents want me to move back to france. :(

milkytae: WHAT

jintleman: WHAT

meep: WHAT

kooknoir: FINALLY

hobihobo: WHAT

damnjoon: oh no :(

jimonchèrie: i know i know :/

jintleman: WHY

jimonchèrie: my dad said that this school rots my brain so much that i lost all my french skills

jimonchèrie: how do i tell him that i was never able to speak french to begin with

jimonchèrie: i mean look at my username,,,, it's completely wrong too 😭

jintleman: that is true,,, 'mon' is masculine, 'chèrie' feminine

jimonchèrie: i know :(

hobihobo: it's 2021, fuck gender rules 🙄

jintleman: but the pronoun doesn't match the noun at all

jimonchèrie: OKAY WE GET IT

jimonchèrie: hhhhh

milkytae: if you leave i'm coming with you

milkytae: and i swear i'll never touch your toothbrush again

jimonchèrie: no tae, it's okay

milkytae: OKAY,PHEW BC YOUR TOOTHBRUSHES ARE NICE, WHERE DO YOU BUY THEM

jimonchèrie: NOT THAT

jimonchèrie: but you have people you love here too

jimonchèrie: jungkook for example,,, which i really don't understand 😬

kooknoir: hello??

jimonchèrie: oh shut up, don't act like i didn't see you all happy and stuff when i announced my leaving

jimonchèrie: but still, you're staying with him

milkytae: no! besties over boyfies

kooknoir: HELLO??

meep: this can't be

jimonchèrie: yoongi i'm so sorry baby :(((

meep: when will you depart??

jimonchèrie: i'll have an online meeting with the principle of the new school first

jimonchèrie: to see if they're even going to accept me there

hobihobo: when may that be??

jimonchèrie: tomorrow

milkytae: TOMORROW!?

jintleman: THIS IS HORRIBLE

jintleman: CANT YOU JUST QUICKLY LEARN FRENCH AND CONVINCE YOUR FATHER TO STAY HERE??

jimonchèrie: you're telling me to learn french in 24 hours??

jintleman: yes?

jimonchèrie: that

jimonchèrie: is

jimonchèrie: brilliant !!

jimonchèrie: if it weren't for tae, with the brain you have, you would be my best friend, jin!!

milkytae: HEY

jimonchèrie: you're literally in time-out rn,,, toothbrush thief

hobihobo: thiefbrush

milkytae: so if i'm in time-out, who's going to help you study french, huh?? 🤨 jin can't help you today, he has classes

jimonchèrie: touché.

hobihobo: LOOK HIS FIRST FRENCH WORD

hobihobo: AT THIS SPEED, YOU'LL BE FLUENT IN NO TIME !!

meep: are you sure this is going to work??

jintleman: of course it will yoongi 🙄 we just gotta make him learn some french phrases by heart AND BOOM

jintleman: jimin stays in whatever unknown country we're in rn forever !!

jimonchèrie: indeed ☺

'jimonchèrie' changed their name to 'jimonchère'

jimonchère: see! we're one step closer!

milkytae: it's cher, not chère

jimonchère: OH COME ON NOW

'jimonchère' changed their name to 'jimoncher'

jimoncher: THERE WE GO

hobihobo: PROJECT 'KEEP JIMIN AWAY FROM FRANCE' LET'S GO !!

chat noir it's on sight

kooknoir: this isn't going to work, is it??

damnjoon: i doubt that it will

meep: i don't know guys,,, my inuition tells me they will somehow manage to do it

meep: this is a crazy world,,, like the amount of stuff they told us about?? i wouldn't be surprised if he gets to stay here in the end

kooknoir: omg yoongi manifest it

kooknoir: does anyone know some good subliminal link here??

meep: 😐

kooknoir: what? don't disrespect the law of attraction, grandpa 🙄

______________

(A/N: hey bitches and bros and non-binary hoes

sup

yes you'll have to wait some more to find out if jimin will stay, yes yes, that's the point of a book 🙄

anyways,,, this bool will probably soon BUT NO NEED TO WORRY

okay maybe

as i said i might write another one for another group,,, depending on how creative i am 🤷‍♀️

anyways stay strong besties, have a good one 💪)