The Lies Told in The Name of Love

139K 3.9K 35.2K
                                    

"Finally, it's relatively clean..."

You spent about your whole evening wiping off dried blood from your precious spray guns. It took about a bucket and a half full of water and bleach, but now they look as good as new - though, a hint of red could be seen on the base and muzzle of the gun. It only took until nighttime.

What a pain... Stupid Cicin Mage... Thinking she's at my level, what a joke.

Sitting in your room with your butt on the floor as you admired your work, you looked at each weapon if there were any more stains that needed to be cleaned. Other than that, they were just to your minimum liking. A small smile on your face showed how much you missed using them, you looked no more innocent than a girl playing with her dolls.

"Pew..." You fired a pretend shot at the closet, aiming lazily. "Wooosh... What... you hate the cold...? Good."

Luckily for you, no one was here to interrupt your little childish play here. It felt nice to reminisce every now and then. You continued to indulge yourself in the glory days when you would shoot anything that moved and even say a snarky catchphrase in the middle of it. Those were the days...

"I'm so bored."

In the middle of it all, you remembered all the good things you could no longer have. Every single day with Scaramouche was filled with excitement. Debt collections were like errands. Arrests were almost like immature roleplay. Meetings were filled with playful kicks and nudges under the table. Training...

For some reason, your thoughts came to a stop. You found yourself carelessly scratching the back of your head with the muzzle of your gun as you tried to finish off whatever it was you were trying to remember. Whatever it was, it was probably not worth thinking about.

You wished you noticed it sooner. You wished that you noticed those empty holes in your memories. It was difficult to place yourself in society as the good or bad part. There are no such things as good Fatui members.

Then, you begin to imagine a vaguer you, narrowing yourself down to a woman and Scaramouche a simple man.

A woman without her man is nothing.

How about...

A woman, without her, man is nothing.

So, that's how it is.

"Oh, my Lord Scaramouche... You should have stopped me from leaving."

Why am I like this? It's always been this way, you always pinned the blame on other people. Will you ever learn? He did try to stop you from leaving, it was all the Traveller's fault. Enticing you with her empty promises and wonderful sounding words. Scaramouche's words were only the painful truth, yet you still wanted to get away from that.

You thought you could be safe if you left with the Traveller, but your problems were never really solved anyway. As you said to Childe before, Lumine must have had other people like you before. How you foolishly entrusted this stranger with your life is beyond anyone's understanding. It was a hook and sinker, like a fish you were snatched from the water and dragged along a perilous journey leading to no sanctuary.

At this point, you slowly made up your mind, you weren't a good person, you never were. After being told that you were only forced to follow outrageous orders made you feel so out of touch with reality. You were sure that you had full control over your actions - full control of your thoughts when committing such violent arrests.

Who had the right to tell you that you were the victim? If anything, you were probably the accomplice to your own destruction.

More questions than answers, as always...

Dirty, Little, Traitor [Scaramouche x Reader] Genshin ImpactWhere stories live. Discover now