Chapter 12: A Call From Mom

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Dixies POV:
No. This can't be happening. Absolutely not. My mom and I had lost complete contact when I moved. I needed to get away from all the toxic people in my life, so losing contact with them was the best option. That and moving away. So I did both. And I have been by doing a good job and keeping thing that way until of course, I see a email from my mother. My stupid fucking mother.

Unknown person~ Hello Dixie. It's your mother. I know you don't want to get from me, you made that very clear, but please. I need to talk to you. You know my number, call me. Please.

Absolutely fucking not. I made it very clear to her that the days of her and me are over. I suffered enough for to her controlling and constantly drunk ass. I could go my whole life without talking to her again. I don't need her. I never have. and I never will. "What's on your mind?" Noah asked me, as I was clearly puzzled.

Her email took me by surprise. "Nothing. I'm fine." He looked at me as if I was stupid. "Your not fine. Your face just changed in one second, what happened?" He knows me too well. I guess sleeping with a person really let's you form some sort of a connection. "It's my mother." I stated firmly. He still looked puzzled.

"What about her?" I'm getting there. "Like I told you, we lost all contact. I haven't spoke to her since I moved, and now I just got an email from her saying that she wants me to text her." His face looked more shocked now. I had told him everything about her and our relationship, so he understood what big of a deal this email actually is.

"What are you going to do?" smart question. And luckily. I already know the answer. "Simple. I'm going to ignore her. And act as if I never read this stupid email." I sighed looking at him, his eyes filled with confusion. Was he disagreeing? "Are you sure that's what you want to do?" He furrowed his brows. "Why wouldn't I be sure? I mean, what else would I do?" Wasn't the answer quite obvious? I thought it was.

"You do whatever you want. But maybe you should think more about this." I thought he would be on my side. Wtf. "What more do I possibly need to think about?" I said with more of an attitude. I don't want anything to do with her. It was that simple. "Maybe the reason she contacted you was important. Who knows, maybe she changed." He shrugged his shoulders as if what he was saying actually made any sense.

"If there's one thing you should know about her, it's that she will never change. She is still going to be the same woman she was before." My voice only got more and more firm with each word. Was he fucking kidding me right now? "You wouldn't know that." He DID NOT just go there. Yes. Yes I would. More than anyone else could possibly ever understand.

"Yes. Yes I would. My mother treated me like literal shit, especially after I got diagnosed. I had to grow up, knowing that my own mother didn't even love. She used to make me think that me getting cancer was my fault. And that I ruined her life because of it. I had to grow up always being reminded that I was a mistake. A child that no one wanted." My eyes started to water. "So yes. I do." He looked at me genuinely.

I could see that regretful look in his eyes. "Look, I appreciate you trying to fix this. But my mother, will never be fixed. I don't know why she want's to talk to me, but I am not taking my chances. For the first time in months, I have been happy. I feel like myself. I don't need her to bring me down agains. I don't want her to." I sighed. My tears that were forming, going away.

He wrapped his arms around me. His body close to mine, holding me. "I'm sorry. You know what's best for you. So do what you feel is the best. And if you think that ignoring her, is the best thing for you, then you should do that." He comforted me, talking so softly. I felt safe in his arms. Something about the way he held me, always got the best of me.

"Thank you." I lifted my head up, kissing his cheek softly as his hand went up to mine. His touch so powerful, yet so elegant at the same time. "Anything for you." He kissed my forehead, causing my heart to do backflips. It was times like these when I rethought how I looked at him. He could be so gentle with me at times, that I would comply with anything he told me.

"How about we go for a drive. Relax a bit." He looked at me sincerely. It's as if he knew that that was what I needed. As if her read my mind. "That sounds good." I smiled up at him, cuddling up closer to him before we both got up. The more I hang out with this man, the more I see myself falling. And falling is not something that I like doing.

The last time I feel for someone, I only hurt myself more. I damaged everything good I had left in me. And I became a person that I did not recognize. A person that I absolutely despised. What if the same thing happens again? I know I can trust Noah, but only to a certain extent.

What if I commit and he hurts me. My heart won't be able to take any more damage than it already has. It's still patching up from previous heartbreak. Noah might have come in my life, and saved me. But that's temporary. Who knows if he's gonna betray me once I fall. I can't handle that. Not right now. The only problem is, I don't know if I can stop falling. Because as Selena Gomez would say... 'the heart wants what it wants.'

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Hey lovessss!! Updating has been so frequent recently, I'm honestly surprised with myself. Not much else to say other than, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Love you all very much<3
Word count: 1081

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